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Corner Pub #2

Tone of Voice

Purple Poet On Wheels
Member

since 2002-06-21

Posts 145
Pittsburgh/Edinboro, PA

0 posted 2004-11-20 05:52 PM

“I’m crumbling”
I said in a strong
Tone of voice
Unknowingly

“I can tell a lot from tone of voice”
Bruce said
“And you’re not crumbling”

“I’ve prepared myself”
She said
In tone of voice filled with
Intense angst, anger frustration and
Pain
Stemming from her parents’ tumultuous relationship
And chaotic family life
That she was just describing to me
I saw through the non-façade
Unbit my tongue
And told her what I saw
Within a minuet’s time
She begins to sob
And can only be consoled
By the arms of her lover

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

1 posted 2004-11-20 05:58 PM

sigh

Purple Poet On Wheels
Member

since 2002-06-21

Posts 145
Pittsburgh/Edinboro, PA

2 posted 2004-11-20 06:02 PM

I wasn't sure if I effectivly captured the moment

What do you think?

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

3 posted 2004-11-20 06:04 PM

oh I know the moment so well myself
and yes, you did an excellent job

Broken_Winged_Angel
Senior Member

since 2000-04-06

Posts 994
Small Town, Somewhere

4 posted 2004-11-21 11:51 PM

*blinks*

Very nicely done...and I agree, you did capture the moment there....

BWA

Your time is here. Take one last look at it, then never come back. This part of your life is already over...

Purple Poet On Wheels
Member

since 2002-06-21

Posts 145
Pittsburgh/Edinboro, PA

5 posted 2004-11-22 08:00 AM

Thank you both

I needed to be reassured

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