Do you have a little time (for me)

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Corner Pub #2

Do you have a little time (for me)

Ludo
Junior Member

since 2004-01-29

Posts 23

0 posted 2004-07-13 05:28 PM

What did I do
To make you
be like this?

          So near, but yet you’re not here.
          You have no time for me.

What did I do
To make you
cause me pain?

           Bitter, Sharp, Harsh, Cold.
           You have no time for me.

What did I do
For you to
make me cry?

          I retreat.
          You have no time for me.

What did I do
For you to
want to hurt me?

          Confused.
          I have no time for me.

PatAngel
Member

since 2004-04-05

Posts 451
California

1 posted 2004-07-14 02:09 AM

Ludo,

Such deep emotion! I felt the sadness in your words.

Patricia

'When you find a dream within your heart, don't ever let it go.
For dreams are the tiny seeds from which tomorrow grows.'

junemac
Senior Member

since 2003-04-24

Posts 1005
uk

2 posted 2004-07-14 03:07 AM

Very emotional, very nicely written with short bursting stanza's and a great lay out and a fantastic last stanza which was reallt powerful
this one knocked me off my feet with its love and realization.
very well done !!!
hugs June x

Kellsue
Member

since 2000-05-06

Posts 210
Waukesha, WI USA

3 posted 2004-07-14 11:19 PM

Great powerful emotion...and I can relate! Great job on this..bravo!

Kelly

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give. ~Winston Churchill

You can give without loving but you cannot love without giv

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