Inside

Nobody knows what goes on inside;
of the pain and the loneliness I've learned to hide.

I smile, and I dance; I laugh, and I sing-
so the world outside won't notice a thing.

But inside I'm dying, more and more every day;
to keep it from showing, I must find a way.

My friends are my friends when I'm happy and bright;
but they push me away when my mood mirrors the night.

Look into my soul where the darkness reigns-
can't you see I've no strength to break free from its chains?

It wears upon me, it steals my breath-
to the point that I no longer fear death.

It's tearing me down, it's taking my life;
I'm not sure how much longer I can cope with this strife.

People say to me, "Why can't you be gay?"
"Come on, cheer up, it will all be OK!"

They say there are fixes for the problems I have;
solutions that heal like a soothing salve.

It's not that I don't want the help I could find;
the problem is one of a financial kind.

I can only afford to help one along,
so I'm the one who must remain strong.

There's another who has the same struggles each day,
and it is she who deserves to find a clear way.

Blonde hair, blue eyes...my daughter's more important you see.
Besides, she inherited these genes from me.