Open Poetry #8 |
Sparrowhawk (a haiku) |
Colin Senior Member
since 1999-06-05
Posts 596Callington, Cornwall, England |
Swooping gracefully, a flurry of blues and greys, darting swiftly by. < !signature--> "We are the music makers and we are the makers of dreams." - Willy Wonka. [This message has been edited by Eric Williams (edited 06-24-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 Colin Ramage - All Rights Reserved | |||
Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
Eric, This was lovely! Enjoyed the haiku very much. Wish I could write them...oh well. Take care. Amy "Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is before you can meet again. And meeting again after a moment or a lifetime is certain for those who are friends." "Fate exists but it can only take you so far, Because once you're there It's up to you to make it happen." |
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OLIAS Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090Pearl city Iowa |
Every word is movement, I love it, swooping, darting and flurry. Excellent. Thanks for sharing Olias |
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Colin Senior Member
since 1999-06-05
Posts 596Callington, Cornwall, England |
Thanks Amy I write them in my head, taking the basic idea and then juggling some words about until they fit. Maybe try juggling words on a bit of paper? Go on, be brave, give it a try Glad you liked it Olias. The inspiration was a sparrowhawk darting through a gap in our field hedge, seeing me and turning so swiftly and smoothly then disappearing across the field faster in a matter of seconds. Eric. "We are the music makers and we are the makers of dreams." - Willy Wonka. |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
Greetings, budding Haikuist I have an indulgence in this artform and its real good to see another poet practising this deceptively simple art You have fulfilled the requirements of haiku well,Eric...can see the sparrowhawk in my mind, soaring free as the wind keep posting your haiku! |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
Ahh Eric, how I love haikus! And yours was perfect, imagery wise and creatively well said! Keep sharing those haikus of yours Take care, Melissa Honeybee |
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redheart angrybraids Member
since 2000-04-16
Posts 410honolulu, hawaii |
hey, i like haikus, and i will read them on the train and in the car and in the rain, i really do like haikus, i didn't know, there so simple and truthful, lovely words, thank you. Kindly, Redheart Angrybraids |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Eric~ I also love the Haiku. Thoughts are so clarified when we 'think' in Haiku. I can just see yours taking place and that's the very essence of Haiku. Will look forward to more. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Colin Senior Member
since 1999-06-05
Posts 596Callington, Cornwall, England |
Melissa, did you REALLY say "perfect"?? *big smile* Thankyou Redheart, I'm glad you like it, and them Thanks for the reply. Marge, you are so right about Haikus clarifying the thoughts. With so few words to work with you have to make every one count and that focuses you! I'm pleased you could see it happen, that means I've done my job Eric.< !signature--> "We are the music makers and we are the makers of dreams." - Willy Wonka. [This message has been edited by Eric Williams (edited 06-26-2000).] |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
A lovely image shared through these few words, Eric... so nice... ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
Silly me, I have read this twice and NEVER replied either time....kept getting sidetracked. I love this, it shows how you think (I think!) as in, how much you love the outdoors etc etc (which I gather from your poetry...which if you paid attention in class you'd know I feel the same about nature!) Wonderful work, I especially adore the last line, the changes you made have taken a Haiku of somewhat wonderful nature and made into a Haiku of an Incredible Nature!!! I do wish you'd write more..and join us in CA...Brad doesn't bite too hard... ~Heather |
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Colin Senior Member
since 1999-06-05
Posts 596Callington, Cornwall, England |
Thankyou Claire And thankyou too Heather to answer your question.... I would absolutely LOVE to join you in CA but hmmmm, I was sure you lived in Or? Eric. "We are the music makers and we are the makers of dreams." - Willy Wonka. |
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