Open Poetry #8 |
Snow |
OLIAS Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090Pearl city Iowa |
I have been reading a few Haiku's posted by Melissa these are wonderful, very difficult, here is my first effort, with a hidden message. Snow Softly falling flakes, Kissing mountain top retreats, In downy, drowsy white. Olias |
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© Copyright 2000 Mick Yates - All Rights Reserved | |||
Jan Member
since 2000-06-14
Posts 114 |
Excellent. I'd never have guessed it was your first attempt. |
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OLIAS Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090Pearl city Iowa |
Thanks For your interest Jan im eager to read some more of your work, so come on dont be shy lol Olias |
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Justbleu Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329Oregon, Originally From Alaska :) |
I'm originally from Alaska!! Reminded me of home!! Liked it a lot!! Very good first attempt!! The new challenge was very well met!! I also found The HIDDEN MESSAGE!! Bridgette "Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again. To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
You, my friend, wrote an amazing haiku. This was a brilliant first haiku. You're a natural at it! Please write some more for us! Take care, Melissa Honeybee |
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OLIAS Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090Pearl city Iowa |
Justbleu, Ive never been to Alaska, but I've done it in England (skiing that is) thankyou for giving me the confidence to give it another go Melissa- To you I owe my inspiration, you are teacher of form, content and magic you have shown me the way and I will always be grateful Olias |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
Olias, thank you so much I am flattered, but, seriously I am by no means a great poet at all, I just try my best to write something that's decent enough to show here. You are so very talented and truly intelligent, maybe you should be my muse now Tare care, Melissa Honeybee |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
OLIAS,im afaid i dont know the hidden message but i think this is a magnificent first attempt...(mine sucked big time ) and pls pls feast this reader with your natural talent!! Budding haikuists unite!LOL |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
as perfect and beautiful as a snowflake ... great job...excellent first attempt I dont do Haiku...I TALK TOO MUCH take care jm What the caterpillar calls the end ... The world calls a butterfly ~LaoTzeTao~ ~Butterflies are meant to be free~ |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Great first attempt. It doesn't show. I am unsure if I truely found the hidden message, but I did find one never-the-less. |
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OLIAS Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090Pearl city Iowa |
Thanks everyone for replying its much appreciated, the hidden message is just SKI, not very deep but what can you do with three lines lol, Regards to you all Olias |
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