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Open Poetry #8
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The Envelope
| Open Poetry #8 |
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The Envelope |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California 
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The Envelope I found it after years I saw how it was stamped with so many colors and words I saw a piece of tape mending a tear the paper now thinning…almost transparent one sticker hanging on by a corner said love This envelope was sent many times across the miles and now it was ripped and torn slit with a perfect pointed opener Return to sender I saw in bold black letters no longer at this address I read I remember once it was perfumed with a tinge of innocence and a SWAK in red with blotted pink lips now it smelled like the dust of old books in a second hand store There were flower stamps and stickers with smiley faces and on the outside barely visible worn by time’s ink fade I read I love you in a child’s tortured print I found it pressed in a dictionary one of those big ones from the library that you can’t move stationary with the weight of words Now it is fat and full it is so heavy with feeling that it falls and opens on the hardwood floor of time and all those words just roll towards me like colored marbles [This message has been edited by Martie (edited 07-24-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Oh, Martie...I'm sitting here and don't know what to say.....other than that is the greatest last line I've ever seen in a poem and I love you for it (don't tell Mr. Martie) This forum is full of touched people. Everywhere I look I see comments like "this touches me" or "it touched me"....and the only words I can come up with regarding this poem is "This touches me"...because it really does.....beautiful, beautiful writing, wonderful person. |
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MMoonchild Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715PA |
Now it is fat and full it is so heavy with feeling that it falls and opens on the hardwood floor of time and all those words just roll towards me like colored marbles I agree with Balladeer I was enjoying the whole poem but when I reached the ending something inside weeped.... ~~softly Maureen |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
Martie.....I loved this one all the way through, but the last 2 lines were the impact point. This is wonderful writing!! Love received is equal to love given! |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Perfect poem. Loved it. What an ending!! LW Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
What a truly special poem a special person has graced us with. |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Martie~ So special So individually you ... Yes, 'touched' is a good word. Love you~ ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Balladeer- Your comment to this poem (can I say touched...yes!) touched me more then any I have ever received...it was so honest...and I love you for it. Maureen--I guess those last lines brought out the weeps...It was supposed to. Thank you! Sunny--Thank you so much for your wonderful comment. Lone Wolf--You have paid me three great compliments...thank you Mike--I am so glad to see you here...I've missed you. Your comments are always so important to me. Thank you! Marge--Touched IS a good word...you should know. Love you! |
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ma miller Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 806 |
a glorious piece, Martie ... loved it ... fav ... it is so heavy with feeling that it falls and opens on the hardwood floor of time thanks |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
MA--Thank you for the glorious in your reply and thank you for reading. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Ah so lovely.... This piece just shines through brightly... regards to you Martie, Sudhir |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Martie, So many feelings roll out of your words, I feel as though I have touched that envelope. At least my heart has. Your writing is extraordinary. liz |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
Martie this has the essense of bittersweet sans lachrymose.....and to think... we think kids know nothing... seemed like we knew more back then... well said |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Thank Sudhir for your lovely reply. Liz--You have touched the envelope. Rebel--the tears are the learning tool where youth finds wisdom. |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Martie I have to agree with all the rest that this is superb writing. What captivating mood throughout and that last verse oh that last verse...I can't find the words..I just can't PS Why is'nt this a book submission? |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Beautiful Martie...just beautiful. ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Written with perfection as only you can do. Your style and imagery never ceases to amaze me and the precise ways you get your words to fit is a sheer delight. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
and on the outside barely visible worn by time’s ink fade I read I love you in a child’s tortured print I found it pressed in a dictionary one of those big ones from the library that you can’t move stationary with the weight of words Now it is fat and full it is so heavy with feeling that it falls and opens on the hardwood floor of time and all those words just roll towards me like colored marbles ====================== sweet poet...your words are like colored marbles... or more appropriatly might be like rare and fine jewels.. shimmering gem stones this poem proves my point later 14k-gator  jm |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
ethome--You found the words just fine...thanks for thinking book submission, but I already heave quite a few. Claire--thanks for the beautiful. Mark--What a wonderful compliment...thank you! |
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juliet_2u Senior Member
since 2000-07-23
Posts 1125North Carolina |
Martie, I could see that time weathered envelope in my mind so clearly, What a gift you shared with us. Juls |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Sorry Janet, my sweet friend, didn't see you..thanks for the jewels...and for your sparkle. juls--I'm so glad you liked it...thank you. |
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