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Open Poetry #8
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Ariels song (a reply to sunshine and svens challenges)
| Open Poetry #8 |
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Ariels song (a reply to sunshine and svens challenges) |
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Walter Poe Senior Member
since 1999-10-13
Posts 787 |
MELODY of my heart, SONG of my life Sweet Ariel singing the songs of strife A PIECE OF MUSIC quelling the night The birds in the AIR join fish in seas In the musics perfect harmony Bring back my love, unsheath thy knife the voice so strong touchs stars reaching out for the heart of lost love a TUNE of love to the gods own ears to bring back a love lost in tears Show the power, Of my love so strong As her voice grew the wind turned cold as the gods look down her story told In a hymn carried of the winds control and the truth they saw of the loves lost Feel my pain wind and rain, come clear my name She sung the mantra of the sea come one come all drown in me the gods own hand touched the land Hunting down the lost loves man Hear the wind across, Hear my voice, Bring him to me As the sea was calm and the gods found her adam and life was returned to body grown cold all that remains is the chant I no longer love you let me be Let me be I like a challenge and i tried to combine both Svens and sunshines challenges in this piece (The word MELODY was the one i used to fulfill sunshines challenge) Oh Danny boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling From glen to glen, and down the mountain side The summer's gone, and all the roses falling 'Tis |
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| © Copyright 2000 Paul Weatherstone - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
the voice so strong touchs stars reaching out for the heart of lost love a TUNE of love to the gods own ears to bring back a love lost in tears Show the power, Of my love so strong As her voice grew the wind turned cold as the gods look down her story told In a hymn carried of the winds control and the truth they saw of the loves lost Feel my pain wind and rain, come clear my name She sung the mantra of the sea come one come all drown in me the gods own hand touched the land Hunting down the lost loves man Hear the wind across, Hear my voice, Bring him to me As the sea was calm and the gods found her adam and life was returned to body grown cold all that remains is the chant I no longer love you let me be Let me be ===================== walter this is exquisite... as always in your work...such strong emotional imagery... this is excellent, love the way you combined the two challenges... this is like an ole song of the seas... perfect... jm There are places inside our souls - that have never been touched. There are places inside our hearts - that need to be loved this much. ~jm~ |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Walter, this is a lovely piece and I am honored that you brought up that old challenge and did something beautiful with it! I will have to issue more challenges soon, just to see what you will come up with! Sunny ~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. Helen Keller ~~~ When you want to be loved, look within...KRJ |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
I like the simple yet haunting way this poem was written and i think its very clever of you to combine both challenges so wonderfully   |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Oh Walter, this just flows so beautifully! You have "more" than met the challenges ... you've exceeded them with this lovely verse. Wonderful! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
Walter, I'm sitting here right now looking at the screen in AMAZEMENT. . . becasue you have seamlessly met both challenges with a poem that is truly superb. . . Haunting, yet beautiful in its sadness. . . Excellent!! ------------------------------------------------------------ That which gives light must endure burning --Victor Frankl |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Walter, a beautiful melody. wonderful poem. why must we pray screaming? why must not death be redefined? we shut our eyes we stretch out our arms and whirl on a pane of glass-patti smith |
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