Open Poetry #8 |
The Tricks of Memory |
Effigy Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486disbelief |
An apparition so perfect in it flawless design. Chimera, deception it's all mine. Dreams, those delusions of what was never so perfect in life. Dreams, those fancy fallacies that span all the world and seven seas. In un-enchanted nighttime slumbers I had no lovely, peaceful fantasies, just more ambiguous hallucinations, brought on by invisible temptations. I have seen visions and inviting mirages secretly inhabited by ghost and ghouls and an assortment of other forgotten phantoms. But her. she has not left me, a memory, a living specter. Her spirit lost in the uncertain labyrinth of illusion, and random memory. A little pixie dust will make it right, that’s all that is needed on this sleepless night. After all, what is reality anyway? Nothin' but a collective hunch. |
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© Copyright 2000 wes wiggins - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Effigy~ Oh, I like this ! 'A little pixie dust will make it right, that’s all that is needed on this sleepless night.' YES ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
This was hauntingly beautiful, Dreams can hold escape as well as pain for what is only a dream. Great writing~ |
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Effigy Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486disbelief |
Thank you Marge, I'm glad that you enjoyed. Butterflies - You so right dreams can be quite the double edged sword. After all, what is reality anyway? Nothin' but a collective hunch. |
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Effigy Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486disbelief |
Thought I would send this around one more time. Just for the hell of it. |
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forne_marin Member
since 2004-04-13
Posts 140Spartanburg, South Carolina |
This one is going to be long. I loved the imagry and language, but the rhythm is terrible. The best way I know to help you with this one is to rewrite it, see if I can't help you clean it up. An apparition so perfect Flawlessly designed Chimera, deception All of it is mine. Dreams, delusions of things that were ever imperfect in life. Dreams, fancy fallacies spanning the world and seven seas. In Un-enchanted nighttime slumbers I'd no lovely, peaceful fantasies just ambiguous hallucinations of invisible temptations. I've seen visions and inviting mirages secretly inhabited by ghosts and ghouls Assortments of forgotten phantoms--but her She's not left me. A memory. A living spector. Her spirit lost in the uncertain labyrinth of illusion Some pixie dust will make it right All that's needed this sleepless night. See how easy that was? You could have done that. |
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