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Open Poetry #8
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She came
| Open Poetry #8 |
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She came |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla 
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She came Out of the mist of time she came Without a notice without a name. And I could not preform the gist Nor explain the beginnings mist. She showered me with wanton need Those things I thought were black of deed. Stirred my cauldron fired up jewels Defied the gods of earthly rules. She was the giver and the tender The reigning flower and splendor. The precious moment in my reach My fantasy and dreams beseech. I caught the echoes of her let By force of heart and seismic net. Felt the ringing and the toll Here in the chambers of my soul. What conjuration could I use To calm the dragon of this muse. Fired and fused the cauldrons blew And brought about a world of new. Now I hover the why of things And grow myself some dragon wings. |
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| © Copyright 2000 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
magical... Sunny ~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. Helen Keller ~~~ When you want to be loved, look within...KRJ |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
I love how you start your verses in this one.. "Out of the mist of time...... She showered me with wanton need..... She was the giver and the tender..... I caught the echoes of her let... What conjuration I could use......." A great intro to a verse makes the reader want to suck the rest up like a sponge. Very well done..Bravo! |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Sunshine, Thank you for the magical ethome, A wonderful comment, thank you. |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Magical yes indeed. This has that hidden mystical power of the world that can drive a man to his knees. I really enjoyed this journey you have taken us on. |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
Damn! you're good...... fine writing here |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Dragons, again! They always ruin everything, except the quality of your poetry. Always exquisite Liz |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Dragons ruin things, I don't know LIz. They are very handy at BBQ's. Seymour, a truely magical poem. A wonderful scene. "I've been too honest with myself I should have lied like everybody else" faster-Manic street preachers. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Mark, Wonderful comment. Doreen, This comming from you made my day. Elizabeth, There are good and bad dragons. Love Sy Brain, Thank you for the magical. |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Seymour~ This muse has filled you to overflowing - 'She was the giver and the tender The reigning flower and splendor. The precious moment in my reach My fantasy and dreams beseech.' How I love the manner in which you poeticize ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
This is wonderful, Sy!  Denise |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
I always enjoy your Merlinesque offerings, Sy  |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Beautiful work you have shared with us~ |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Sy--this sweet render is poetic splendor!! |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Marge, You are a poetic love. Denise, Thank you for the wonderful. Balladeer, Merlinesque, now that's a $10.00 word. Butterflies, Thank you for the beatiful. Martie, Splendor just soothes my savage soul. *L* |
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angelswing Senior Member
since 2000-02-10
Posts 705United Kingdom |
Amazing ... 'and grow myself some dragons wings' - I loved the idea, this is truly wounderful, adventurous and pictorgraphic in it's intricasy, I loved the deep images you creat and the contrasts between soft and hard sounds, I loved it . One of the best I have ever read . L.of.L. Tom . Don't try, do or do not, there is no try . - Master Yoda - |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Seymour, I made so many reads of this that I forgot to reply earlier... but who could blame me for such wonderful words presented... Out of the mist of time she came Without a notice without a name. And I could not preform the gist Nor explain the beginnings mist. .... What conjuration could I use To calm the dragon of this muse. Fired and fused the cauldrons blew And brought about a world of new. Now I hover the why of things And grow myself some dragon wings. Seymour, this is another brilliant work from you... regards, sudhir |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Sy - Now I hover the why of things.... You have an incredible sense of which words will work when they are used in unusual ways. I would never have used "hover" in that way, and yet it fits beautifully into that line. I always learn something new when I read your poems. You are a rare gem. [This message has been edited by LngJhnAg (edited 07-11-2000).] |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
love the seismic net line. This has such a wonderful flavor or days of dragons and witches, yet beneath that, another layer having do with love. Me Liked. Corinne |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Angelswing, Wonderful and amazing comment. Sudhir, Love to read your wonderful comments. JngJhnAg, And you are a rare friend. Corinne, Thank you, thank you. *L* |
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