»
Archives
»
Teen Poetry #3
»
Sandcastle
| Teen Poetry #3 |
|
Sandcastle |
|
|
Isabelle Member
since 1999-08-25
Posts 176Indiana |
Life is like a sandcastle Build it with time and patience A masterpiece so perfect Then destroyed No matter how many times you rebuild it It'll eventually be destroyed Life is like a sandcastle You spend eternity trying to perfect it Make it that special masterpiece To just be destroyed and started over "Poetry is the music of the souls, and above all, of great and feeling souls." ~Voltaire~ |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Jeanna - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
StarPryncess17 Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932Colorado |
oh dear, you're very right. The sad part is the negativity. I'm not one to judge--if you read any of my writing there's almost a guarantee that it'll be sad and depressing--it is a very realistic poem and I hope to see lots more from you! Don't think I've read too many of yours...sorry  Love Always~*~Jessica~*~  "Love is the product of our discontentment with ourselves." "Bleeding hearts release tears of fire" "work like you don't need money, love like you've never been hurt,and live everyday as if it's your last" "Shoot for the moon, if you shall fall short, you always have the stars to fall upon" |
||
|
Lani_DarkOne Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 152UK |
Very very true and well put...nice poem.Keep writing! "You could be my unintended Choice, to live my life extended...." Muse "Even when we're apart we'll still be under the same sky," LJ Smith "Hiding in the musty attic is Elusive She sits, cross legged in a midst dark cobwebs Several forms scurry to seek shelter Beneath her levitating shadow. Her back rigid , eyes glassy Gazes intently at time escaping Sliding, smoothly, as sand sprinkles Through the hour glass, A single tear grazes her misty cheek." Lani |
||
|
Isabelle Member
since 1999-08-25
Posts 176Indiana |
Thanks for your comments. As if you hadn't noticed majority of my poems are negative. I have no idea why i'm fairly happy with things but it just is that way. Again thanks for the comments. Isa  "Poetry is the music of the souls, and above all, of great and feeling souls." ~Voltaire~ |
||
|
Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
Definitely a great metaphor for life, Isabelle. I enjoyed this greatly, but remember that life isn't always so bad. Again, beautiful work. *Krista Knutson* "Cherish your vision; Cherish your ideals; Cherish the music that stirs in your heart, the beauty that forms in your mind, the loveliness that drapes your purest thoughts. If you remain true to them, your world will at last be built." ~James Allen~ "We've made houses for hatred...it's time we made a place where people's souls may be seen and made safe"...~Jewel~ |
||
|
Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
i never thought that life can be put as such an object but you showed me that it can be. i give you props for that poem because it is very true. |
||
|
Angel Senior Member
since 1999-07-02
Posts 551Pennsylvania |
New way to look at life, although it is negative . Really, it isn't always so bad, but the poem was really great .~Susie "If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man's life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility." ~Henry W |
||
|
Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Enjoyed ARCTIC WIND |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
