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hoppy
Member

since 2000-01-27

Posts 271

0 posted 2000-12-10 01:32 AM

Here's a little poem i wrote a while back that i think you all will enjoy. Just a little thought that originated from the idea of....well...no use to spoil your creative reading skills...i'd like to know what you all interpret out of this...always enjoy hearing things like that....anyway...here it is

I asked you the question
Then we sat and talked
Your words were hallow
And eyes filled with thought
In your eyes I found Words
Words trapped by the tounge
In your eyes you warned me
Teased me with feelings, i see
In your eyes fear
Lost in world of maddness
With emotions standing still
Dreams speek to me
Your eyes still shine
I'm defended by silence
Defeated by time
The end i know not
Waiting to see what time buys
But for now, i'm lost in your eyes

Swift as a shadow, short as any dream;
Brief as the lightning in the collied night,
That in a spleen unfolds both heaven and earth,
And ere a ma

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

1 posted 2000-12-10 01:39 AM

Awwww such a sweet poem. I like the ending a lot. This was a great read, as usual. Keep them coming in!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!

~*~PrettyGirly~*~
Member

since 2000-11-04

Posts 83
Fitchburg Ma Usa

2 posted 2000-12-10 11:25 AM

Hello, good poem it's sweet. I use to get lost in my boyfriends eyes, now when I look into his eyes I see lies. Bye Minna

A romance last forever you want it, A friendship last a life time

sweetstuff101
Member

since 2000-07-27

Posts 375
OK, USA

3 posted 2000-12-10 07:07 PM

That was REALLY sweet!!! I don't knwo quite what I get out of this poem, but when I read it I started thinking about a certain someone. I really enjoyed it, and the ending was good. Keep writing!!

Much Luv,
~*~SweetStuff~*~

~*~GoOd fRiEnDz ArE hArD 2 FiNd, HaRdEr 2 LeAvE, & iMpOsSiBlE 2 fOrGeT~*~tHe HaRdEsT tHiNg tO Do iS wAtCh tHe 1 U LuV, lUv sUm1 eLsE~*~

Lakewalker
Member Elite

since 2000-08-05

Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people

4 posted 2000-12-11 01:22 PM

I like this in your note: "creative reading skills", that's cool. What did I get out of this? You're lost in her eyes, seeing her thoughts and stuff. I like the poem a lot, excellent job on it.

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.thehungersite.com

Child of the Stars

Senior Member

since 2000-09-07

Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI

5 posted 2000-12-11 06:53 PM

Hey. This kinda just sucked me into its words, I love it when poems do that. Terrific job..

~Carly

hoppy
Member

since 2000-01-27

Posts 271

6 posted 2000-12-12 12:51 PM

thanks for the replies everyone! some interesting "interpretations" and ideals about this one...but as i see it everyone totally missed it, as i hoped *L* but i would like to reveal the meaning of it....if anyone would like to put in anymore replies or tell me not to tell them do it ASAP cause i'm going to spoil it tomorrow

happy reading

Swift as a shadow, short as any dream;
Brief as the lightning in the collied night,
That in a spleen unfolds both heaven and earth,
And ere a ma

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