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Teen Poetry #3
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Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

0 posted 2000-10-25 04:16 PM


NOTE: one of my fav styles to write in.


Reversal:


Steeple guides me to my wonderlands.
Tear wiped away with two loving hands.
Destiny not ready to prevail.
Love potion is all within the mail.

Faded path amongst the rocky way.
Situation bad, and yet I stay.
Jacket on to prevent blister cold.
Moldy bread I eat, or so I'm told.

Broken down I never cease to cry.
In my mind I always seem to fly.
Wishing upon shattered, lonely stars.
Conquering the kings, the lords, and czars.

Bringing back the past is what I fear.
Mysteries are lost, and life is mere.
Dreaming of a time where time is dead.
Lost within the shadows I will tread.

Flaming body seen during high noon.
Wondering if I will die quite soon.
In my eyes I've always been alone.
All I want is to go back to home.





"I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust."

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!

© Copyright 2000 Pepe de la Muerte - All Rights Reserved
Child of the Stars
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
1 posted 2000-10-25 08:27 PM



  Hey there. Why the heck doesn't anyone reply?? COME ON PEOPLE THESE ARE AWESOME. I love the symbolism you use, it's so hard to understand and that's why it's so great!!! heh well see ya...

  ~Carly

The grindstone of life will either polish us or wear us down, depending on what we're made of.


Morouxshi San
Member
since 2000-10-11
Posts 207
San Juan, Puerto Rico
2 posted 2000-10-25 08:31 PM


the epitome of despair and unwillingness.
dude, bout that org. you propozed, y not?
i mean, i just have to learn how to spell and im all set...  


San, the wise
San, the dumb
San, the guy...

Morouxshi San
Member
since 2000-10-11
Posts 207
San Juan, Puerto Rico
3 posted 2000-10-25 08:33 PM


sorry... the thing froze...< !signature-->

San, the wise
San, the dumb
San, the guy...


[This message has been edited by Morouxshi San (edited 10-25-2000).]

Isabel Galaxia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733

4 posted 2000-10-26 08:32 PM


It's great, AGAIN!  You make me jealous..how can you write so much and it be so good?!?  Not fair!!  Sometimes I wonder...how much IS symbolism?  Well, yup it's good, keep it up(like ALWAYS), hasta luego
Bel

P.S.  Nice style  

[This message has been edited by Isabel Galaxia (edited 10-26-2000).]

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
5 posted 2000-10-27 04:57 PM


This is just a bump cuz damn......haha....this is one of the poems i think is passable. Not completely sucky....




"I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust."

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!

Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
6 posted 2000-10-27 05:22 PM


Dopey, geez, a little desperate for replies to this one???  I even saw you mentioning it in another poem.  Wouldn't it be horrible now if I told you this poem sucks?  Hehe, just kidding man, you know I like it.  Ah yes, your overflowing symbolism has breathed new life into this forum.  Of course, i haven't been here much longer than you, but still.  Anyway, nicely done with this poem

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!!

Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
7 posted 2000-10-28 01:32 PM


My favorite amongst your other poems I've read so far.  That's all I have to say about this poem, and that should give you an idea on how I feel about it.

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


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