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Teen Poetry #3
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StarPryncess17
Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932
Colorado

0 posted 2000-10-20 05:40 PM



*Interesting perspective*

A broken heart
a bleeding wound
a passionate love
ended too soon

too many words said
that just weren't true
deceptions and lies
that have me blue

So many thoughts
I still have of you
I'm left not knowing;
left without a clue

My heart now throbbing
with pain and tears
you always told me
you'd be there for years

I never would've guessed
you'd do this all to me
I guess that I was
just too blind to truly see

Took our friendship and
turned it inside out
"it'll help OUR relationship"
You would proudly tout

I gave up my best friend
for you and only you
and now that you are gone
I just don't know who to go to

I'm all alone because of you
IO should've thought before I leaped
Now drowning in a sea of tears
I think I got myself in too deep

A broken heart
a bleeding wound
a passionate love
ended too soon...

~*~As written through the eyes of my best friend~*~


*Being an angel doesn't mean having a halo or wings, it means doing the right thing and wanting to make a difference*


© Copyright 2000 Jessica Lynn - All Rights Reserved
xShUgArHiGhx
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
1 posted 2000-10-20 06:02 PM


This was a really great poem. Sometimes we loose sight as to what the reality really is. You thought that your guy would always be there and that he was worth risking your friendship with your best friend for when in reality its your friend who would have always be there for you. Its hard to tell what to do in a situation like this but everything has its outcome, unfortunately this is a really lonely one. I hope that you could regain your lost friendship =o) It was a great poem under sad circumstances.

I'm all alone because of you
IO should've thought before I leaped
Now drowning in a sea of tears
I think I got myself in too deep

StarPryncess17
Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932
Colorado
2 posted 2000-10-20 09:46 PM


Just so you all know because obviously I didn't make it clear enough, I wrote this 'through the eyes of my best fried' this is what she did...I just put myself in her position for the purpoe of the poem...I thought it would make for interesting writing.  

~*~KerrsAngel~*~


*Being an angel doesn't mean having a halo or wings, it means doing the right thing and wanting to make a difference*


Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
3 posted 2000-10-20 09:53 PM


I think this is well done.  And you didn't even go through this?  Well, good job on it

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!!

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
4 posted 2000-10-20 10:59 PM


Well this was a good short syllabled poem. Nice job....even tho you didn't go through this it's nice to see you care
.



"I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust."

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!

sweetstuff101
Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 375
OK, USA
5 posted 2000-10-21 01:26 AM


this is a beautiful poem! I really liked it alot. I am really sorry, but I know how it feels to lose a best friend, I just lost one of my best friends ever, and I wish I could fix it, but I can't. Well written, it flows well too. Keep writing!!

Luv,
  Priscilla


~*~ YeStErDaY iS tHe PaSt, 2mOrRoW iS ThE fUtUrE, ToDaY iS a GiFt, ThAt'S wHy We CaLl iT ThE pReSeNt. ~*~



Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
6 posted 2000-10-21 07:41 AM


Being able to express another's anguish so well in your own words, shows your skill in writing Jess. You've done an excellent job of stepping into her shoes and portraying these emotions ... well done!  

Best wishes,
/Kit

Isabel Galaxia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733

7 posted 2000-10-21 04:28 PM


Jess, this is great!!  So sad, but really good.  I'm sorry this happened to your friend  .  Well keep up this writing, you're talented
Bel

Chel
Senior Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 511
Baltimore, MD, USA
8 posted 2000-10-21 06:47 PM


Hey there Chick, great poem, but it seems as though your still not happy.  Keep your head up, things will get better.  Keep up the great work.

Chel


"True friends stab you in the front"
"True love last forever"

branden726
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-25
Posts 607
Bay City, MI
9 posted 2000-10-21 07:45 PM


Ya know i come back from being gone for like almost 2 weeks (seemed like forever) and i read this poem and it just still makes me mad to see that your not happy. Y is that?
C'mon i write about sad things 2 but i always have something happy to back it up. Hey good poem but try writing happy thoughts sometime

"what doesnt kill you only makes you stronger"

Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
10 posted 2000-10-21 09:53 PM


I kinda figured that out Jessica.  I only have one thing to say to you.  Be there for her now.  Maybe now is the time, that's if she really mean a lot to you, and I know she does.  Be the best friend that she had again.  Be there for her.  You probably are already, but if not, do so  

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


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