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Teen Poetry #3
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Broken Trust (pls read)
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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Broken Trust (pls read) |
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sweetstuff101 Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 375OK, USA 
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Broken Trust Drip... It rolls down my cheek... Past my lips... It tastes a bit salty... Then it falls on a picture... It’s a picture of you. One by one More tears follow the trail of the first Soon tears are rapidly pouring from my eyes But you don’t see my tears Because you are not around You’re mad at me It’s my fault All I was trying do was help But I don’t think I know the meaning of help Everytime I try to help All I seem to do is mess things up more You tell me things And I cry inside My eyes begin to fill with tears But I fight them back I keep them in I don’t want you to be sorry for telling me But I see now that you already are Because I broke my promise I broke our trust I told someone I was only trying to help I knew she wouldn’t tell Only offer advice Advice I couldn’t give you I want to fix this But I don’t know how All I can do is cry Over our broken trust ~*~ YeStErDaY iS tHe PaSt, 2mOrRoW iS ThE fUtUrE, ToDaY iS a GiFt, ThAt'S wHy We CaLl iT ThE pReSeNt. ~*~ [This message has been edited by sweetstuff101 (edited 10-19-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Priscilla - All Rights Reserved | |||
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luvnkris Member
since 2000-08-31
Posts 144Perth, Australia |
this was really good. i'm sorry about whats happening to you. its happened to me b4 too... not good  i hope things improve! keep writing! Luv Jo xoxoxox * never live a second without being grateful for all you have around you* |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
Wow this was really good...I could see a picture of what you were talking about...A friend of mine lost my trust in her once she decided to get with the guy I was in love with...And he also lost my trust...For just a kiss they both lost something that is very hard to just give back...Good work!!! ~*Love is sometimes like a rose. Beautiful in the beginning but dies in the end.*~ |
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sweetcollege_girl Senior Member
since 1999-12-03
Posts 872just about where I want to be |
Good luck, sweetstuff...I hope all goes well with ya! Great poem too..trust is a very hard thing to give to someone who has broken it before...good work  ~*~SCG~*~ |
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the dark angel Junior Member
since 2000-05-10
Posts 37 |
wow sweetstuff that was so heartfelt and real one of my best friends broke up with me once, cos i betrayed her trust. We became friends again, but it wasn't the same, we never told each other anything. Love and Blessed Be Laura Lee -x- |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
I have to say about the poem, it's really good, I like how you built off of the one tear and formed a whole scene. This sounds like a really tough situatuion. I hope things can work out for you, but for that to happen you have to make it happen. "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!! |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Well broken trust is just the worse and if you plan on staying with the person it takes a while to gain back if it's gained back at all. I wish you luck and this poem was very emotional. Good job, but i wish you didnt have to write it. Unfortunate situation, one of which i've been through.  "I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust." I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them! |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
this affects everyone so dont single yourself out, sometimes something you did can create your own sadness and what you create, you can destroy... great job of expressing feelings in this poem. jeremy r "...if you've never met me, then you've no right to judge me. I have a good heart, but this heart can get ugly." ~DMX~ |
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sweetstuff101 Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 375OK, USA |
Thanx everyone for your replies!! It means alot to me. Much love, Priscilla< !signature--> ~*~ YeStErDaY iS tHe PaSt, 2mOrRoW iS ThE fUtUrE, ToDaY iS a GiFt, ThAt'S wHy We CaLl iT ThE pReSeNt. ~*~ [This message has been edited by sweetstuff101 (edited 10-21-2000).] |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
Broken trust...truthfully, that is really hard to gain back from someone. Show him your poems, show him how much it hurts you that you hurt him. Your poems shows all the emotions you're going thru right now and he should see that. ggod luck I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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Caz Member
since 2000-09-13
Posts 133Concepción, Chile |
I can't believe I almost missed this poem. Excellent poem, I really loved the beginning, that image of tears running down your cheek was amazing... But, I'm so sorry you're going through this, you're so sweet, you're his angel but he just doesn't understand it. Don't worry, it's not your fault, it's just that he's blinded with his problems. Your friend, Caz It's been raining since you left me. |
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