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jeremydraul
Senior Member

since 2000-08-01

Posts 1118
State of Despair

0 posted 2000-10-18 10:05 PM

Your state of being replenishes my warmth, brings me into another place,
It uplifts my feelings, making me seem glorious in my own splendid grace,

When your face lights up, my eyes begin to glisten in your vibrant beauty,
In my eyes all I see is elegance, a winner in my heart, you’ve obtained the key,

It’s like you control my mind, you’re my everything, your always with me,
I want to see through your eyes, to know where I stand and how to be,

I’d die for the cause, to be with you for a short time, memories always remain,
We could flow and rhyme, and through the tough times, we will share our pain,

Tingles in my body begin to phase my skin, produce bumps of innocent love,
If you were a caged bird, I’d never let you fly away, your what I need more of,

Always persist in my heart, I beg you to acknowledge my presence of concern,
Everything I see, reminds me of you, for you are what I will forever yearn,

"...if you've never met me, then you've no right to judge me. I have a good heart, but this heart can get ugly." ~DMX~

sweetstuff101
Member

since 2000-07-27

Posts 375
OK, USA

1 posted 2000-10-19 12:40 PM

aaaww that was beautiful!!! I loved it!!

"We could flow and rhyme, and through the tough times, we will share our pain,"

My fav. lines

Great job, keep writng!!

Luv,
~*~Sweetstuff~*~

~*~ YeStErDaY iS tHe PaSt, 2mOrRoW iS ThE fUtUrE, ToDaY iS a GiFt, ThAt'S wHy We CaLl iT ThE pReSeNt. ~*~

Kit McCallum

Administrator

Member Laureate

since 2000-04-30

Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada

2 posted 2000-10-19 06:36 AM

Very beautiful thoughts Jeremy ... tender, romantic sentiments full of longing, nicely penned!

Best wishes,
/Kit

Lakewalker
Member Elite

since 2000-08-05

Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people

3 posted 2000-10-19 04:13 PM

Whoever you wrote this for has got to be incredible. That's what this poem was, incredible. The feeling behind it, I don't know, it just seems sincere and from the heart. And it doesn't hurt that it's well written. Ok, I'm liking this too much. But really, it's good

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!!

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

4 posted 2000-10-19 06:53 PM

awwww how sweet.....well that's about it....good job!

"I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust."

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!

jeremydraul
Senior Member

since 2000-08-01

Posts 1118
State of Despair

5 posted 2000-10-19 09:32 PM

thanks, your compliments and thoughts are what produce what i write, its my motivation, its really nice of everyone to say such things.

jeremy r

"...if you've never met me, then you've no right to judge me. I have a good heart, but this heart can get ugly." ~DMX~

Child of the Stars

Senior Member

since 2000-09-07

Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI

6 posted 2000-10-19 09:36 PM

Wow, you sure do have a way with words. This was really, really sweet. Happy writing!!

~Carly

I'm nobody, who are you?
Are you nobody too?
Then theres a pair of us-dont tell!
They'd banish us, you know...

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