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Teen Poetry #3
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Worn Out
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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Worn Out |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico 
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NOTE: this is pretty damn dark but oh well. I was messed up, what can i say? Worn Out: Breathing; Panting; Escaping the nothingness. Withering within myself. I can't; I can't live on. It's uncontrolable, This infinite hell. Breaking; Tearing; Caged within self. Trapped in all aspects. Decaying; Dying; It's all that confounds me. It's all that I am.  "I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust." I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them! |
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| © Copyright 2000 Pepe de la Muerte - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Hey. Yeah, this was dark. Really cool though. Happy writing... ~Carly "I see," said the blind man to his deaf wife reading the newspaper. |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Dopey, hmmm, I like it, it seems sorta...desperate. Good writing  "Escaping the nothingness. Withering within myself." "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!! |
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Isabel Galaxia Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733 |
Dopey, it's dark but it's good. When did you write this...? Oh well keep it up Bel |
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keoni Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850Up in the mountains in the NFC |
I like this, don't worry about it being dark because it all has to come out sometime right? And by the way, it's keoni and it's HIM. No prob though KEONI |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Well yes this is pretty desperate and im so glad this could be felt within the poem because that is the EXACT point i was trying to make. Glad you all liked it a bit....i don't......cuz the mood i was in.....well it was HORRIBLE. So yea, but anywayz...thanks guys, adios!!! "I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust." I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them! |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
Very dark indeed which makes it special in a way, it shows your deep down feelings and doesnt hide anything even if that means sacrificing that sweet kind of poetry, great creation! jeremy< !signature--> "...if you've never met me, then you've no right to judge me. I have a good heart, but this heart can get ugly." ~DMX~ [This message has been edited by jeremydraul (edited 10-18-2000).] |
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peanogrl83 Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 202 |
Mmm, cavernously dark, but I like it...quite expressive. :.) Vreni |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
Dopey~We all do something that we wish we wouldnt remember but these are your feelings...You did an amazing job expressing yourself...You opened up a different type of world for us to see you as...We all have problems and sometimes it gets to overwhelming to keep them in...And we have to find a way to let it out...And you did the perfect job doing it...Thanks for sharing this!!!  ~*Love is sometimes like a rose. Beautiful in the beginning but dies in the end.*~ |
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