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Teen Poetry #3
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Rockhead01
Junior Member
since 2000-06-26
Posts 12
Maryland, USA

0 posted 2000-06-26 04:03 PM


Looking Back

I sit here at my desk
Writing to those who care
Writing about my life and its meaning
Writing about death or should I dare?
My life to me these days
Has been one battle after another
Trying to make poeple happy
By being a good son or brother
As I look back at what I've done
My accomplishments are few
Trying to find that point in time
Where everything went askew
My dreams of being someone important
Were shot that day when Coach cut me
Baseball was my one and only dream
And without that there's nothing I can be
Being in high school is a flop
I'm barely passing as it is
The harder I try the worse I do
But no one understands what that means
Everyone says "You're not trying hard enough"
Or "You need to get your act together"
But it's easier said than done of course
I hope someone thinks of something more clever
My parents are going crazy because of me
All the s**t I've put them through
But i want them to know right here and now
None of this is by fault of you
And to all my friends who are worried sick
A small yet important favor I ask
So not be afraid of what I might do
But be thankful for what I've done in the past
I call out to God (if there really is one)
To help me get through this painful time
I need a sign not hidden or muffled
But one seen plainly by the naked eye
I cry myself to sleep at night sometimes
Wondering whether or not He's going to answer me
Whether or not He hears my prayers and pleas
Whther or not He's going to set my soul free
So until that day hwen He answers me
I'll sit here and wait looking back at my life
Hoping and wishing that someday soon
He will set my soul free and end my strife



© Copyright 2000 Dan Youngs - All Rights Reserved
Crystalina123
Member
since 2000-01-31
Posts 228

1 posted 2000-06-26 04:21 PM


First off, welcome to Passions!!! Second, I really liked your poem, great first post. Third, this poem is written way to close to the heart to be about someone else right? This porm is most definately (sp?) about you, right?
Ok, based on that assumption, I'm going to say something: I think that you have accomplished many things in life. For example, the ability to express yourself in writing. That's an accomplishment, because I know of many who can't do that. And the fact that you try to be a loving son or brother -- that shows you care about others and you have made an impact on someones life. And what about the small things you accomplish daily? For example, making someone laugh or even turning your eyelids inside out   Simple dumb stuff like that . . .
I think it's amazing that you can admit to being upset or lonely or scared, but I also think you have so much going for you. Yes it's important to try hard in school, but it's not the end of the world if you don't do well. I nwas an honors student all the way through high school and almost put a gun to my head when I ruined my 4.0, no joke. But then I realized that some people who have the 4.0's have gotten it by cheating, in fact most of them have. I finally decided it was more important to be able to look myself in the mirror each day than to get those straight A's. Ok, this reply is getting really long!!!
I'll let you go, b/c I'm probly boring you to death. But keep your chin up b/c you ared an awesome person, and I look forward to seeing more of your work. E-mail me sometime at Crystalina123@yahoo.com if you want.

Love,
Crystal

Maybe God has us meet a few wrong people so that when we meet the right one we can truly appreciate the gift.

Vball Chickie1624
Member
since 2000-05-14
Posts 116
New York
2 posted 2000-06-26 04:54 PM


I love this poem.  It's full of feeling and expression.  It's a deep and beautiful poem.  Keep writing!!

luv ya,
Danielle  

"Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you

Snickers
Member
since 2000-05-25
Posts 88
East Haddam, CT
3 posted 2000-06-26 05:22 PM


Welcome to Passions!! This is a beautiful poem yet so sad, and I can absolutely relate to it.  I find myself feeling as you do often, but u mustn't give up.  Always have hope because you never know what tomorrow will bring.  I know that God hears u'r struggles but unfortunately the answers are usually not as clear as u would like them to be.  Try to remember that u aren't the only one out there with problems and strife, because I know so many others (myself included) who understand and who have been there.  I could go on forever b/c I really do have a lot to say, but if u need someone to listen I could do that also.  Please feel free to E-mail me at Snickers_2000@webtv.net  Sometimes just talking to someone helps.  I truly wish u the best and hang in there.

~<3 Alwayz~
  **Nikki**


~*~*~*~*"We can complain because roses have thorns, or we can rejoice because thorns have roses." *~*~*~*~

Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S
4 posted 2000-06-26 07:13 PM


well welcome to this place. i voted for this one and great poem. keep it up and you seem kind of like me dark in your own way you use the same Icon and i also wrote a poem named Looking back. well can't wait to read more.

I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson-


Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural
5 posted 2007-11-18 03:30 PM


Enjoyed

ARCTIC WIND

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