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Teen Poetry #3
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my rose
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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my rose |
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Ethan Halo Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793on the roof again 
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*here's one o my fav's. hope y'all dig this one.* My Rose Falling in love; it hurts so much. The pain just grows as you're falling apart. But how is it that it hurts even more If i never had you from the start. Does any of this mean one damn thing? Is this all just wasted time i've spent? I always trip on the line that divides who I am and who I invent. Neither one of us will let the other in too deep. Too afraid of what the other's gonna think. All this pain and failure makes me feel like I've been living a hundred years. I can't remember ever sleeping without a pillow full of tears. My soul is abused and gone; I keep coming back for more. You're the prettiest rose in the garden; And I'm bleeding from the thorns. How can wanting to give you the world be something I shouldn't feel? Are cold shoulders and dodging eyes signs of emotions not so real? You never could really look me in the eye. Cover up your lies with all my truths. Haven't you heard? Love's a two-way street. I got a feeling I'm bein' used. The past always holds the better days. Then i tripped on the feeling of being alive. i mistook you for someone who gave a damn. The good memories are struggling to survive. I was on my knees, prayin' for rain. Didn't know I'd get a storm. You're the prettiest rose in the garden; and I'm bleeding from the thorns. Maybe someplace, far from now When I don't need to remember anymore, I'll stop by and pay you a visit to pick up my heart from your bedroom floor. While I'm there, I'd also like back my intensity and my attitude. And if you're finished, I'd like my soul and all the emotions you abused. If you could just take off your armor and leave your status home for the night. See the Me you always ignore. See the Me you could learn to like. Why am I the Runner-up whenever i run your race? But play the game inside my heart and you'll always get first place. Gave you my heart but you didn't seem to know what it was for. You're still the prettiest rose in the garden. And I'm still bleeding from the thorns. < !signature--> We all got somethin' we need to atone for. [This message has been edited by Ethan_Halo (edited 06-22-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Ethan Halo - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Jeremiah Johnson Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223Brooksville, Fl, U.S |
this one starts out happy and becomes a sad one. but i still like it so keep it up. I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson- |
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peanogrl83 Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 202 |
Ethan - I always trip on the line that divides who I am and who I invent. Keep it up, I'm loving it. lol Vreni |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
i love reading your poems. they are so beautifully written. and i really liked this one. |
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Lani_DarkOne Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 152UK |
I agree with Vreni on everything including those two lines...they just jumped out to me. The language and imagery you use is so clear and effective...keep writing! "You could be my unintended Choice, to live my life extended...." Muse "Even when we're apart we'll still be under the same sky," LJ Smith "Hiding in the musty attic is Elusive She sits, cross legged in a midst dark cobwebs Several forms scurry to seek shelter Beneath her levitating shadow. Her back rigid , eyes glassy Gazes intently at time escaping Sliding, smoothly, as sand sprinkles Through the hour glass, A single tear grazes her misty cheek." Lani |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
"You're the prettiest rose in the garden; And I'm bleeding from the thorns." Powerful work, my friend. I can relate to this extremely well. I hope someone comes along that can help you heal all those wounds you got from the thorns. "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde "The robbed that smiles steals something from the thief" -Shakespea |
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Ethan Halo Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793on the roof again |
you guys and gals are way too kind! i love ya all. thanks for having the patience to read and for the kindly criticism. it means a great deal. We all got somethin' we need to atone for. |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Enjoyed ARCTIC WIND |
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