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Teen Poetry #3
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Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S

0 posted 2000-06-21 01:50 AM


Alright this poem is one of which i wrote and dedicated to someone. this is dedicated to my god daughter Jamie because her father was killed by our rivel gang.

Those walls once standing now lay as
Rubble.
On this field of human prey
I tried so hard to keep these windows bard
To save you from this world so not to be lead
Astray.
I love you and your still dad's little girl
I did what i could, now i can see if i did what
I should.
I hope this old hood doesn't take you under like
It usually would.
You've got a strong mind and good soul.
So i hope your dad's proud to see you as a
Three year old.


I'm the lord, I'm the havoc, I'm the soul



© Copyright 2000 E'Val - All Rights Reserved
Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
1 posted 2000-06-21 03:00 AM


that was one of the sweetest poems that i have ever read. it show that you must really care about your neice. i know how you feel with the gangs killing her father. one of my closest friends got shot. then later on he died. another one got shot in the face. its sad but true. im really sorry to hear about her father. check out my poem "Still Remembering You".
Yu Lan
Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462
New Zealand
2 posted 2000-07-01 04:54 AM


yeah, this is really sweet Jeremiah.. really lovely. ^_^



Lynne

"He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened." Lao-tsu



Jeremy Halstead
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 569
Morris, Ill. U.S.A
3 posted 2000-07-01 05:08 AM


I'm not sure if I even have the words right now to express how I feel about that piece.  It's really something special though...seriouly.

Jeremy

"Time is the matter, and in a matter of that all wounds will heal and all scars shall fade."

cutie2005
Member
since 2000-04-30
Posts 148
Bennett, Colorado USA
4 posted 2000-07-01 10:53 AM


That poem is sooo sweet! I loved it.. my dad died when i was 2, although i can't remember anything really about him.. it still hurts, but i know he is watching over me, so it makes me fill better!!! I loved it keep it up!
TearsOfPearls
Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 322
Vereeniging, South-Africa
5 posted 2000-07-01 04:17 PM


This is a lovely poem and it has so much emotion in it.

Waves...amazing hey? Wind blowing over smoothe ocean water creates shear. The longer the wind blows, and the futher the fetch, the more energy gets transferred from the wind to the water. What started off as a breeze 1 000km away, ends up as a glass-faced barrel at some far off beach.

StarPryncess17
Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932
Colorado
6 posted 2000-07-02 11:32 AM


Jeremiah~this is definately my favorite from you!! I love the emotion you seem to prove to your god daughter! Keep this kind of writing up! And take care of that little girl! Love Always~*~Jessica~*~

~*~Love is the product of our dicontentment with ourselves~*~
~*~SMILE! It makes your butt shine!~*~

TAP2
Member
since 2000-06-29
Posts 211
Morris, Il USA
7 posted 2000-07-02 12:08 PM


The emotion conveyed through this piece speaks louder than the words found therein. I lack the eloquency to say all that needs to be said about this piece. Very moving.
TAP2

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural
8 posted 2007-11-24 07:20 PM


Enjoyed

ARCTIC WIND

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