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Teen Poetry #3
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Lost (senryu)
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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Lost (senryu) |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people 
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empty are my dreams since you left our perfect love for I am alone |
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| © Copyright 2000 Lakewalker - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Salooma Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781 |
this was really good...i like the soft, simple nature of this, but if i may ask...can you explain a senryu?  I've never written one and just heard of them here on the forum.Thanks.. Salooma |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Senryu is like a haiku becuase it has 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the next, then 5 in the last. The difference between them is that a haiku deals with a nature subject and a senryu doesn't. Hope this helps |
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Salooma Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781 |
thanks lakewalker...helps a lot guess they are both japanese forms of poetry...right?? salooma |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
You got it. Here's a link that explains more Posted in the Poetry Workshop Well, maybe I'll get to see a few of these posted from you soon? |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
Very sad but very beautiful! Nicely done! *Krista Knutson* "You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back." -Barbara DeAngelis |
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peanogrl83 Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 202 |
Ah! Refreshing is the word that comes to mind, Lakewalker! Though it deals with a not exactly optimistic subject matter, it is cuttingly effective in the senryu style - not overly verbose or flowery. Splendid! Vreni |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
Short and simple, we all feel this at one point, just keep on a smile and prevail. ,._-=-~^* Jeremy *^~-=-_., "I will know where I'm headed, cause I'm so tired of the suffering I stand before you, a weakened version of your reflection" ~DMX~ "Prayer III" |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Thank you everyone, it's always great to hear such inspiring words |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
lakewalker~~~this may have been short but it came out just perfect!!!short and yet soo good!!!keep up the good work buddy... ~*~TrUe LoVe Is ThE cLoSeSt ThInG tO hEaVen~*~ |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Thanks ERIN |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Aww.... this one is sad.  Hope everything turned out okay, considering this was probably years ago.  ~Allan Its rather handy being at the top of the food chain...you can sort things out and not get the blame for it. ~~Elizabeth Johnson (anonymousfemale) |
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