»
Archives
»
Dark Poetry #2
»
EagleOne - Proud Warrior
| Dark Poetry #2 |
|
EagleOne - Proud Warrior |
|
|
Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia 
|
I seem to have caught Sven's Sickness and I say to him,"A pox on you Sir Sven for passing on your passion'd plague.Now when am I going to sleep?" Still! gonna write it all out until the cure comes. Defending the weak, Fight the good fight Protecting the meek Standing for right Tears on his cheek At all, loss to might Strong as pure teak Withholding the night Holding those bleak Relates to their plight Defending the weak Fight the good fight [This message has been edited by Kethry (edited 11-28-2000).] |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Lynne Dale - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Writing out our souls, Words are blood to the poet. A well written piece, it flows onward. Although, This piece could be added to, With lines between, the lines, Perhaps something of an event. Defending the weak, Fight the good fight Protecting the meek she lost herself in crying Standing for right Tears on his cheek At all, loss to might he walked off with out trying Strong as pure teak Withholding the night Holding those bleak she felt herself now dying Relates to their plight etc. I liked it as it was, But it does set one to thinking, The sign of a good bit of poetry. Gloom |
||
|
Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Gloom, I liked your additions, but I'm not sure they went with what I was trying to say about EagleOne. Perhaps they did, let me think about it. Be well Kethry Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant - Thoreau |
||
|
dragonpoe Senior Member
since 2000-11-12
Posts 608Palm Bay, Florida |
Read the poem and Prof. Gloom's response, and I am not sure which way to say to go. I like the original piece, but I too, wonder if there could be more said about it. But that would be very difficult, holding the challenging rhyme pattern you have here. My opinion, leave it, and maybe write Eagle One- Proud Warrior, The Story, and add those detailed events as Prof. Gloom suggests, I think that too, would be a wonderful poem to read.  With the word, I am mighty, with the pen I am free.. dragonpoe |
||
|
Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Dragonpoe, I'll take your advice and maybe let him make the final decision. be well Kethry Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant - Thoreau |
||
Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
I am sure Eddie will love it..nicely done ~Victoria~ A poem is never finished, only abandoned. - Paul Valery (1871-1945) |
||
|
EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
Kethry, you know that I love this. I am humbled and honored that you wrote this for me. As for changes, I think if it is the way that you intented it to be then it should be, I like it the way it is! I do truely thank you for this my friend! "The heart and soul have no illusion of boundries when friendship is the quest" ~ My Angel. |
||
|
Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Kethry...he is all this and so much more...mere words cannot convey his spirit or his mind... |
||
|
fractal007 Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958 |
I liked Gloom's idea too. However, I also enjoyed the original. It was short, sweet, and carried a lot of meaning. Both poets are pretty good, anyway, lol, so both versions are quite well done. |
||
|
Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Victoria, as we love him.  Paula, I agree, he is all that and more  fractal007, when you have the inspiration, like Eddie, it's easy. EagleOne, You my friend are very, very welcome and all I did was wrote what I saw, although maybe I didn't catch all of you, I tried to catch you implicit essence. I hope I suceeded. Be well Kethry Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant - Thoreau |
||
|
Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
Wonderful Kethry. . . Just let it flow my friend. . .write what comes to you. . . The cure is to write on!!! ---------------------------------------------------- That which gives light must endure burning --Victor Frankl |
||
|
Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Sven, As I did with Eagleone and your gallery as inspiration. Be well Kethry Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant - Thoreau |
||
|
Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
And he looks mighty cute in wings and a halo ...what a beautiful tribute Kethry...I'd say you probably made that Aussie Angel blush Fantastic!! < !signature--> The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched ---- they must be felt with the heart~ *??* [This message has been edited by Butterflies_dont_cry (edited 11-29-2000).] |
||
|
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
and you should hear his manifesto on fate and destiny wonderful portrait of our Eagle Kethry his quiet comfort spirit and gentle strength shine in his poetry. well done poet later-pallet-gator jm Sprayed across my heart and hers Danced butterflies in the wild This angel, this woman , who loves me with the innocence of a child. ~DeVante~ |
||
|
Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
BDC, thanks, I don't see why he should blush. It would be different if it were UNdeserved praise, which it isn't... Janet Marie, Yes I think he shines, he's one of the rare gems, as are you. Be well Kethry Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant - Thoreau |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
