Dark Poetry #2 |
One Wish |
Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
If I was a witch, and could use only one spell, The spell would be, to lock you behind the gates of hell. Or should I turn you, into a frog or maybe a toad, and drop you off, on a far away desert road. Maybe I would lock you away, in a barred up cage, taunting you, just to see, all of your rage. One wish would be perfect, life would be happy for me, but for just one second, open your eyes to see what you're doing to me. < !signature--> ~*~TrUe LoVe Is ThE cLoSeSt ThInG tO hEaVen~*~ [This message has been edited by ERIN (edited 09-02-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 Erin Erbs - All Rights Reserved | |||
ilph Member
since 2000-07-28
Posts 78 |
Erin, I like this..how you have all these supernatural spells you wish to inflict but then in the end all you want is something which doesnt need a spell...just acknowledgment. Sounds rough. I hope things are better. ilph. |
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Deranger Member
since 2000-05-10
Posts 498Somewhere, between here and there |
That was magical! Hehe, sorry for the lame pun… Opening peoples’ eyes would indeed be a magical power, but its clear I think, that no one possesses it… Lalala, yummy yum lalala . --- Spreading insanity, one post at a time “Writing about darkness comes easily for me. I just close my eyes and write what I |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
ilph~~~One day I hope that things will be better. This poem is to the same person all my other ones here are for, my "sister". The first 3 are what I wish I could do to her. And the last one is something I wish she would do for herself. Deranger~~~I dont want the power to do it. I want her to open her eyes herself. Just to see the way she treats me and how my life is so f***** up because of her. She makes my life hell. |
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LM Senior Member
since 2000-08-03
Posts 585 |
Haha! "Or should I turn you, into a frog or maybe a toad, and drop you off, on a far away desert road." Sorry for that, but it was so funny!!! I'll have to remember this one to use on my sis as well Great one! |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
LOL LM I was just thinking how witches always talk about frog (need a frog leg ya know) so I thought it would be good!! |
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sonjes Senior Member
since 2000-02-18
Posts 564North Carolina |
This actually starts out almost light fare and then...WOW!...the tables really turn. By the end of the first stanza, you leave the reader thinking, "Damn! Who did what to this girl?" Liked the whole witch thing instead of genie, djini (whichever spelling you prefer), gives the poem a more foreboding feeling. Don't care what people say Just follow your own way Don't give up and use the chance To return to innocence. -Enigma |
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Lonelypoet Member
since 2000-05-10
Posts 123Conklin,NY,USA |
ERIN, What a heart breaking poem, I hope your "sister" will wake up and treat you right!! I hope you feel better.... Dreams are the the gateways to making the impossible possible So many words, for the broken heart... |
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StarPryncess17 Senior Member
since 2000-05-31
Posts 932Colorado |
My dear DQ friend! This was brilliant! I too wish I could do this...to my dad. you know the story. Anyways,a wonderful poem as usual and I hope that your sister wouldn't be so stubborn. One day she'll realize it Erin, truly she will, but it will be too late! You are such a wonderful person, do not let her bring you down! I know you won't though, you're awaesome girl! Thanks for the inspiration!! I think I'll write a poem for you. Look for it, either here or in Teen. Thanks you're a peach! Love Always~*~Jessica~*~CDQ~*~ hehee LYM! ~*~ :) If aLl My FrIeNdS JuMpEd OfF a BrIdGe, I WoUlDn'T JuMp WiTH ThEm BeCaUsE I'd Be At ThE bOtToM tO CaTcH ThEm. :) ~*~ |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
Thank you all for the replies!!!I really appreciate them. As for who said she will get it one day. I really hope that she does. She is someone who honestly deserves to get what they deserve. |
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taramw Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 738 |
ERIN, terrific image with this! Know the feeling too. All the best ~ Tara ~ "A poem should not mean, but be" - Archibald MacLeish |
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SorrowsMystress Member
since 2000-04-01
Posts 178I'm a wanderer, a nomad...I don't live in one particular area, Just wherever I end up. |
Erin- although I did actually like this poem, I am a little disgruntled about how you catagorize witches. Just wanted to let you know that witches are not old women with green skin and warts on their noses cooking up spells of frogs guts and eyes of newts. As a matter of fact, witches never cast anything harmful on anyone, and if they do, then bad things happen to the witch themselves... just thought I'd inform you before the stereotype got out of hand... but nevertheless, I enjoyed the work... "It was my love that did us both to death. " -Sylvia Plath |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
Sorrow~~~I know what you are saying. But this was only made out of a harmless act of what was in my head. I dont know why I thought of a witch when I was writing it. But I am glad you did enjoy it and thanks for reading it. |
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gjam Member
since 2000-08-23
Posts 85Arkansas |
Hi Erin...another great one of course....i don't know your situation...but I hope it gets better...maybe she will wake up someday....take care...Greg |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
Greg~~~I told the story in a couple of the other poems I posted if you wanna check those out. If not I will e-mail you and tell you all about it. But thanks for your reply!! |
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