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Dark Poetry #2
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| Dark Poetry #2 |
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Table Ethics |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland 
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The dolls have their eyes kept closed in revolt to their own commodity. They sit in the shade of a great oak where infants dare not venture. I move through this scene of illuminated childhood dreams to be seated with my three hosts. The garden, where we dine, is painted with images of disarming scenery and still-life. My first host, personified beauty, speaks to me. "The desert is so beautiful but it occupies your thoughts as an obsession. Many a wise man have died in her affections". My second host gazes into my eyes. She is the balance for the universe all the threads of life run through her veins. She speaks with the flicker of her eyelashes. She wastes no effort in speech for her mouth has been sown shut. I never understand why. It is believed that she has too many secrets to keep. It seems to me a terrible crime to be silenced for the sins that man fears confessed. My third host never makes a gesture through out, content in a coma, she is spared the folly of involvement. We finish with tea, as the first licks the coffee from the cream. Our eyes meet, in difficult stares, it is not my fashion to communicate as such so I remain mute. Nervousness strangles as I stumble head long on the lawn in a mess trimmed plastic grass carpet and deckchairs. We all fall down meeting in daisy rings; the Hosts at my side. The second gestures for me to free her from her constraints, I comply in politeness, she squeals in agony falling onto me to swallow greedily. I lie back stunned and wonder how I went from civil company to oral defilement. ========================== an experiment. "I am melancholy, flower cutting through stone" manic street preachers |
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| © Copyright 2000 brian madden - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
brian...not sure how to reply to this...I really enjoyed it...the imagery, the thought, I'm just a little dazed by it...and that's good...I just might have to read it a few more times....It is just so very vivid and interesting |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Brian, this is stunning, and sounds like a screeplay of a twilight zone. Extremely interesting and vivid, I liked it very much Catalinamoon |
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SpitFire Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396 |
~Brian,...I so carefully stepped to the edge of this poem, (as I do with all you write) and completely fell right in. Whoa. Incredible images and mind bulging thougths. Take care B. *Peace. |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
i agree with Martie....but also found that throughout the poem i kept thinking of the image of the Three Fates.... Loved the line "the desert is so beautiful, but it occupies your thoughts as an obsession. Many a wise man have died in her affections" (though one tends to ponder..how wise is the wise man if he is given in to the plaque of an obsession?) you once again awe me, baffle me, and pull me in! ~Dawn [This message has been edited by poutprincess (edited 08-02-2000).] |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Martie, it is ok. I don't know what to make of the poem myself. This one is was born when I just let my thoughts riot. It is an old poem over two years old that has been rewritten in an attempt to make sense of it. THanks for your wonderful response. cat, thank you for your wonderful reply. It is like a twilight zone version of a doll's tea party. SpitFire, I hope you did not hurt yourself when you fell in. There is a stairs to your left that will bring you back to "the land of sane thoughts" LOL thanks for your wonderful comments. Dawn, within everyone wise man there is a fool waiting to act, and visa versa. Thank you for your very generous comments. "I am melancholy, flower cutting through stone" manic street preachers |
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EWDrake Member
since 2000-07-30
Posts 183NC, USA |
You have a magnificent work here. It's so multi-layered it probably says much more than you initially intended with first writing. Now that you've cleared the placenta, give yourself a pat on the back...you have granted us an excellent wordchild of muse, entertaining even as it leaves us searching within ourselves for the piece each secrets away which we need to fully understand your vision. That's a VERY good thing... Well Done! With a long held breath given dark freedom, the single flame in sorrow's window flickers out. ~EWD~ |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
ya know what Bri-guy... when you "riot" ... YOU ROCK!!! this poem is so damn cool!!!! even if you nor the reader has a clue what it means.. each can come away with their own take.. and the imagery and creativity alone is enought to give it wings to fly... exceptional writing later-bri gator eve-gator |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
brian, smarty alec Sudhir is trying to understand this... you helped the second hostess have the stitches removed from her mouth and let her free to speak and you have been showered with abusive words... eh??? or may be she just kissed you... hmmm that much for oral defilement huh?  (imagination running wild)seriously, I liked a few parts tremendously... should I point out... yes I should... content in a coma, she is spared the folly of involvement. ... Our eyes meet, in difficult stares, it is not my fashion to communicate as such so I remain mute. .... I lie back stunned and wonder how I went from civil company to oral defilement ------ thats it.... regards, sudhir |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Brian. How deep does the rabbit hole go? Go ask Alice I think she'll know. Wonderful imagery. Layer upon layer of the grotesque not quite touching horror. Be well Keth "There are times in life a kindred spirit comes along. Hold onto those people. They are what makes this life worth living."- Anon |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
EWDrake, I am totally blown away by your response. ALl I can say in return is thank you for your very generous words. Jan, maybe I should let it riot more often. LOL. Yes I think it is nice to have a surreal poem so that each person can read what into it what they want. Thanks for your wonderful response. Sudhir, it seems like the best thing to do at the time....rip out her stitches. What I had in mind with the phrase "oral defilement" is not suitable talk for Dark, or even Adult for that matter. LOL Thank you for your wonderful words. Keth, I think even the Mad hatter would be afraid of this tea party. Thank you for your wonderful reply. "I am melancholy, flower cutting through stone" manic street preachers |
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