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The Temple of Reality |
Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
the sign read > FUNERAL > Come Any Time > Services Held Round the Clock. these days almost any attire will do for a funeral but out of respect she wore black from her head to her soul the gravesite was hastily prepared for it happened so suddenly she was taken quite unaware her footsteps faltered and stopped as she fought to hold on to something already gone but anger reached out slapped her in the face and pushed her through the door silence held her half the way there and sat in the seat beside her but for the service she took grief by the arm as she made her way down the aisle she needed, I guess, a bit of strength to view the deceased the burial was quick but she stayed until it was completely over afraid once again to face the door the headstone she thought unnecessary the words carved deep into her soul "herein lies my heart" [This message has been edited by Corazon (edited 06-19-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 zoe d. - All Rights Reserved | |||
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
as she fought to hold on to something already gone but anger reached out slapped her in the face and pushed her through the door silence held her half the way ------------------ afraid once again to face the door the headstone she thought unnecessary the words were carved deep into her soul "herein lies my heart" ---------------- the emotional metaphors and impact of this gave me a chill... written with a haunted ache excellent jm |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
Corazon, got my vote, that last line got me totally, whole poem got me. Great writing K. Parker |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
I think I forgot to vote..... parker |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
Wow, this gave me shivers. I REALLY liked this poem. Kudos! ~Heather |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Wow Corazon ... I am in awe of this one! Truly a wonderful and though-provoking verse, where a second read catches a little twist my first read didn't ... really well done! Best wishes, /Kit |
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
Such imagery - wow this is wonderful Corazon ------truly a poem of art ~netswan |
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Colin Senior Member
since 1999-06-05
Posts 596Callington, Cornwall, England |
Nicely done C. I liked the twists in it... "black from her head to her soul" and then of course the big final twist at the end Eric. "We are the music makers and we are the makers of dreams." - Willy Wonka. |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
thanks all, glad you liked... hey mr. parker...are you incognito??? |
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Elyse Member
since 2000-04-16
Posts 414Apex (think raleigh) NC |
just lovely! luv Elyse |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
N0-brainer here, Corazon. Yes vote for sure! Wonderful writing...... |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
lol@bal's no brainer ...but thanks both of you |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
Hi Coranzor, Wonderful, this is wonderful, oh I said that well I ment it, so much enjoyed. Cerenity |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
"silence held her half the way there and sat in the seat beside her" Really great lines. YES! Votes in here! as always, your writing is superior! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Wow! Corazon--what impact this poem has...well done! |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Wow, really loved this, great imagery. got my vote Yes, I am here, but I am dead, not alive, my body goes on, my spirit has died and I though alive, feel dead inside. "Rose Petal" |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Amazing imagery and such a well written poem had earlier gone unnoticed from my gaze, so ashamed I feel.... Anyway, Corazon, I hope you get what I mean.... regards, sudhir |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
cerenity, marite, doreen, dark angel, sudhir, thanks so much...this is one of "those" you know the kind that pull the pain out and write it on paper, and so it still hurts to read it...but its getting better thanks again [This message has been edited by Corazon (edited 07-17-2000).] |
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Geoffrey Sonnen Member
since 2000-07-05
Posts 142Reading, PA USA |
Powerful story, one that I can relate to. Very moving and very well done. Peace, Geoffrey |
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Not A Poet Member Elite
since 1999-11-03
Posts 3885Oklahoma, USA |
Wonderful haunting and vivid images. Liked it much although sad. Thanks, Pete |
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