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Open Poetry #9
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Running on Empty
| Open Poetry #9 |
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Running on Empty |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California 
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Along the parched road of living there was a sign that read, cool mountain stream, first right at the crossroads. I had to get out of my reverie and walk up close to read in small print, enter at your own risk. Well, I was torched as you can imagine, my engine had been running hot and I could smell the stench of my own insatiable thirst. I looked at my gas meter and it read, running on empty watch what you do another dry mile and you are through. I knew how to fix that you see, my reverie was not all I had, I had a reserve tank of dreaming, and I had dreamed my way into many a place. I shifted out of reverie and into dream and turned right at the crossroads, and came across some assumptions, (standing with their hands on hips in the middle of the road, they were,) so I closed my eyes and smooth as silk my dream took me over their stern mouths and landed me in a meadow, lupine dotted and poppy spilled. I could hear the sound of happiness frolicking in the splash of passion and I slowed to take a breath and that was when I saw my future falling before me, and turned away. I gathered my now around me and fastened it with the exhale of my intake and suddenly I was looking out the window at the middle of the day and my fingers were like small birds pecking at the keyboard and the sound was part of my heart and I wasn’t thirsty anymore. In the dew of little things, the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. (ee cummings) |
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| © Copyright 2000 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Wow! Your cup runneth over, Martie!! This is fantastic! I think I have a new favorite of yours! Wow! Denise |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Martie~ Do I detect a victory here ? 'and suddenly I was looking out the window at the middle of the day and my fingers were like small birds pecking at the keyboard and the sound was part of my heart and I wasn’t thirsty anymore.' How unique .... you're something else, lady !  No roadblocks gonna stop ya' now !  Love those small birds ! Love you~ ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Martie, This was beautiful and very creative!! I love the concept of the dream and the description of the vision that unfolds. Wonderful writing!! Lone Wolf Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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Wilfred Yeats Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704Wilmington, Delaware |
"I shifted out of reverie and into dream" "my dream took me over their stern mouths" "at the middle of the day" "the sound was part of my heart and I wasn’t thirsty anymore." So many lovely clever metaphors yet for some reason - these clicked with me more than the rest - absolutely a first class poem - the best of Martie I've read so far- and that is saying a lot ~You have to have a dream so you can get up in the morning. ~ Billy Wilder |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Martie, your mind and your pen will never run on empty.....THANK GOD!!!!!! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Denise--a favorite...thank you so much for saying so. Marge--small birds can fly over most road blocks, unless of course their computer goes down...thanks sis. Lone Wolf--thank you so much for liking this and for letting me know. Bill--I don't know about the best...but I did enjoy writing it...thank you for your always sweet replies. Balladeer--I sure hope not!! |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
My dear friend you have penned a beauty and I must say once again, I love how your mind works. Next time I need a fill-up may I pull into your wit and get a full tank of Martie--110 octane please? Isn't it wonderful to be able to use our imagination and dreams to take us to where ever we would wish to be.(most times anyway). Loved it and love you my friend. |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
interesting allegory here martie.... quite an imagination in your brain young lady... nice work..  |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
I could hear the sound of happiness frolicking in the splash of passion and I slowed to take a breath and that was when I saw my future falling before me, and turned away. Martie, I think next time I see my future fall I will turn away and head for the place you described, would love to be there right now. The glimpse I saw through your words was beautiful and let my heart rest for a few seconds. Thank you. excellent piece. The softest thing in the world Will overcome the hardest.Non-being can enter where there is no space". Taoist saying |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Martie, what a picture...lupine dotted and poppy spilled... and me, from the valley of the poppies... yep, every word, wonderful! |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
martie - you are so inventive and talented! This poem swept me into the scene so smoothly. I can still see the crossroads, the meadow, everything. I can see you there, too. And yet, there never was a meadow. Absolutely wonderful. |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
My goodness Martie ... your words never cease to amaze me, and I'm sooooo glad of that! What a wonderful read this was ... between reality and dreamscape and back again, with such a positive conclusion. Much enjoyed this Martie! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Mark--You can fill up anytime...got lots of friendship to give you...thanks for your loving reply. Rebel--You made me smile, calling me young lady...I haven't been called that in forever...thanks for enjoying this. brian--if I helped your heart to rest then writing this was worth while...thank you for letting me know. Thank you Sunshine--poppies are beautiful, yes. Long John--there is a meadow...we both saw it, that proves it!! So glad I took you there. Kit--thanks so much for you wonderful response...glad you enjoyed the trip! |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
....and it's good to know you understand the depth of this. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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