navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #9 » I am Melting
Open Poetry #9
Post A Reply Post New Topic I am Melting Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California

0 posted 2000-08-02 06:08 PM



I am Melting

The sky is a slate
and I am drowning in air,
the cement cries
a soprano whale song
from my water of the wilt
into dry dirt tears.

The nectarines are hiding
under green umbrellas,
the gold fish are down
in the dark belly of the pond,
the sunflower is bent and broken,
the birds are panting,
poetry even melts
like last nights candle
it folds and splays
and slithers across the table
as the sun burns white
and the clouds billow around the mountain
waiting for upheaval.

I am melting,
the words slide in my mind
I am to slippery to hold their flame,
it burns holes in my quiet space
as I dangle over the still lake
of reverie
and so I am undefined hot wax
I hold no form
and the sun taunts my need to write
with a lethargy of spirit
that refuses to sing.


© Copyright 2000 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919
New York, USA
1 posted 2000-08-02 06:14 PM


Martie, The imagery you project in your poetry is simply incredible, as is this.  Bonnie
Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

2 posted 2000-08-02 06:26 PM


Martie, as always, I enjoyed your "waxing" poetic, my friend.  

~ Claire

Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau


Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

3 posted 2000-08-02 08:28 PM


Another excellent poem, Martie! Wonderfully done!

Denise

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
4 posted 2000-08-02 08:34 PM


Martie, gal~
You 'melt' so cunningly !

This is poetic paraffin ... par excellence !
You put the flame to the wick !
~*Marge*~



~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
5 posted 2000-08-02 09:19 PM


I know a lot of you guys are used to this hot humid weather...and I can now sympathize with you...we are having black outs, brown outs...or lightning strikes and very muggy weather...thus the poem...thanks for reading my heated melodrama....
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
6 posted 2000-08-02 09:30 PM


Martie, you're hot even when....you're hot! I feel that way about old flames.....
Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
7 posted 2000-08-03 02:14 AM


Your muse seems to be enduring the heat quite well.....must be from the south.lol  This was a wonderful piece and I knew coming in, it would be, as you offer nothing less than beauty in every one you bring to us.  Loved it.  (A FAN)

[This message has been edited by Mark Bohannan (edited 08-03-2000).]

jennie may*
Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 122

8 posted 2000-08-03 02:21 AM


Wow- how do I start?  I can say there are several beautiful metaphors in this piece, and they display so much emotion. I feel so much longing..it seems your words are even melting as you write them...beautiful piece.  

"We have all these galaxies inside of us. And if we don't enter those in art, then I don't understand the point in doing anything."-Sam Shepard

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

9 posted 2000-08-03 03:53 AM


even with a melted muse you are amazing..
very cool poem my dear...
only you could write a cool poem about a heatwave..
later-hot-stuff-gator
jm

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
10 posted 2000-08-03 04:04 AM


I think you are....are you ready for this?

an all temp-a-cheer poet...

wonderful writing Martie I love how you adapt your poetry to your situation.

tracie66
Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713
Australia
11 posted 2000-08-03 06:04 AM


Martie~
Such wonderful imagery...fantastic writings  
Tracie~


Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe


Jon Mewett
Senior Member
since 2000-03-04
Posts 1304

12 posted 2000-08-03 06:11 AM


This is shear beauty.

Fine and arresting imagery.

Regards

Jon

[This message has been edited by Jon Mewett (edited 08-03-2000).]

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
13 posted 2000-08-03 06:46 AM


I hold no form
and the sun taunts my need to write
with a lethargy of spirit
that refuses to sing.
....

What a perfect definition of a perplexed state of mind...

Martie, with such brilliant imagery, you could come up with a great poem with such ease... ah! but you always do...  

regards,
sudhir

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
14 posted 2000-08-03 10:08 AM


Dear Fan---thank you for your words that always manage to make my day!

Balladeer...I was going to say, I am hot for you, but might be taken wrong, you know, so I'll just say thanks.

Jennie Mae--What a wonderful thing to say...thank you!

Janet--thanks, my friend...I hope your computer problems are better.

ethome--that was great...tried to think of a clever right back at ya...but, I guess it's too early.  Oh, how about...I may be hot, but at least my clothes are clean?

Tracie--I'm so glad that you liked it, thank you!

Jon--A very nice compliment, thank you!

Sudhir--You are so sweet...thank you for that!

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
15 posted 2004-05-02 08:02 PM


I understand
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #9 » I am Melting

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary