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Open Poetry #9
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stilled perpetual motion, social studies, and 27 minute agonies
| Open Poetry #9 |
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stilled perpetual motion, social studies, and 27 minute agonies |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon 
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I'm shaking, so cold inside all afternoon I've been watching their faces and I know, oh I know what's coming today at five you'll be here to have "the talk" and I'm so scared to hurt them is more than I can bear there's been no rehearsals no trial runs I don't even know what to say how do I tell those little boys that you don't love me anymore? my fears swamp me my heart racing in my chest this is so surreal my mind can hardly fathom what is happening no..this is not happening! it can't be! I don't want to be here! I don't want to do this! yet, there he is reading his Social Studies book so innocent his face so calm and serene unaware of the storm about to roll over him will he always remember the first day of Seventh Grade as the ending of his happy home? and there cozied on the couch his perpetual motion stilled a moment is my other son the smiles on his young cheek over a silly cartoon ache my heart for I know in 27 minutes he will no longer be as happy no longer have the freshness of youth he will grow up immensely in a matter of minutes they know Daddy is on his way home but not what for [This message has been edited by X Angel (edited 09-06-2000).] |
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Dee Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330Queensland, Australia |
X Angel, you have put the pain of this situation into words so well. No one is ever ready for this kind of pain, especially the children. Well done. Dee |
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Wilfred Yeats Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704Wilmington, Delaware |
for the 4th time you've torn my heart apart - ( you know I'll continue to pray for you) - It is one thing to have a spouse die prematurly - another to be a victim of 'loss of love' - I sincerely hope he continues to love these 2 boys - regardless of what he may no longer feel for you. Assuming that is true - you owe it to them - not to destroy what the feel for him however angry and hurt you may be - I know that will not be easy -it will be painful- but try to look long term. If he does not love them - I suppose you're free to act as you gut tells you - but tread carefully - cruel words can't be erased. tell me to shut up if I'm out of line. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Now you have so clearly reminded me of how the children are hurt when there is a separation or a divorce...so much undeserved sadness to come into a young life...wish it wasn't this way...stay strong for them and for yourself...James |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Heather, Such a grand way of putting thoughts to paper even in moments of agony and pain... I gather that things are not good for you these days... I only hope that they get better with time for TIME IS A GREAT HEALER... I wish you well, my friend... regards, sudhir |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Heather~ While their little worlds will have a new wrinkle ... they will astound you with their resilience. You will find yourself stronger than you thought possible. For that is the way of a mother. Hugs - hugs - hugs and more hugs ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
I can't believe I made it through last night. So amazing. I thought we wouldn't be able to withstand the pain. But we did. We did. Now we handle school today. One step at a time.... Thanks for putting up with all my poems at the moment. and for reading, replying, and caring. This is a scary time to be in. (I'm writing a journal, so far I have 18 handwritten pages front and back, glad I didn't post ALL of those? LOL ooh oops I smiled, DARN!) ~Heather |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
wow.....all I can say is wow.....sorry for your pain, am glad you can write it out and share...thank you |
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