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Open Poetry #9
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Toerag's Return From the Night of the Living Dead
| Open Poetry #9 |
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Toerag's Return From the Night of the Living Dead |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion 
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Toerag, the frisky ghoul hunter, Was awakened from his rest. He'd had a wonderful interlude, During the night of the living dead. He dreamed he was surrounded, On that eerie full-moon night, By hundreds of ghouls slavering, At the thought of holding him tight. Winnowing down one half of them, Was the first thing Toerag did. He sent them back to their graves, The males of the living dead. Then he lined the remainder up, In order of their demise. Thinking he could be easily done, Before the next sunrise. When a female swore her heart to him, He took it from her chest. When another tried to hold his hand, He took it but left the rest. When another said her arms were open, Toerag said he'd have to agree. Not only were her arms wide open, So was her thoracic cavity. Another said she was all aflutter With the way she felt within. Toerag was flattered she felt that way, With her ligaments in the wind. Another swore our Toerag would be, Upon her mind forever more. Unless he watched where he stood, When her brains were on the floor. And so it was that eerie night, That from Toerag it was heard, He'd found his perfect harem, When they were disinterred. heh heh - That old Toerag... He'll do anything for a date. |
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| © Copyright 2000 Michael Waterman - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Lorelei54 Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 458 |
LJA wants to know who has removed all the responses to his poem? And I, being the good wife I am...am sending it back to the top!!! |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Now for all the times I tried to find a rhyme for the word "heard" ... I never thought I'd see it in the same verse with "disinterred"! LOL JngJhn! A little morbid ... but a Stephen King fan I am ... heaven help me!  Best wishes, /Kit |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Yikes! Quite a tale this was! Perhaps it's best to keep moving around this hapless hero ~ Good writing, LJA (still shaking head ~ yes, it's attached!!) |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Well, gals, you really didn't think that a rascal like Toerag could actually score with a LIVING woman, didja? I mean, sheesh - If the devil was a woman, why wouldn't she date Toerag? Because the devil is is evil, not desperate! lol |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Ahem, sailor! *G* Be REAL careful... I THINK I'm still living... and terms like "desperate" can stir up a powerful disturbance... even as dry as the Gulf Coast is, you don't want to be responsible for creating Hurricane suthern! LOL And geesh... can ya blame those gals for wantin' Toe??? They saw him and thought their zombie days were over... that they'd been reprieved and transported to heaven! LOL |
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Justbleu Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329Oregon, Originally From Alaska :) |
Taking yet another stab at the infamous Toerag...speaking of the DEVIL has he been back around lately???? LIKED THIS...very funny...a little gruesome though. Bridgette "Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again. To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
ROFL  This is a riot, Mike....or could start one...a riot of laughter that is! Say is Toerag back? Where is he?!Denise |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
They don't need to be missing many body parts to love Toerag....just a brain!!! |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Oh, Balladeer !  How HEARTLESS ! ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Oh, LongJohn~ I heard that you really had 37 replies earlier ... and a certain person sent them to the morgue ! This was a barrel of laughs. Now where in the Sam Hill is that Toe ? ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Dee Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330Queensland, Australia |
Well done, LJA. Enjoyed it a great deal. (Now I'm interested in meeting this Toerag!) Dee |
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Wilfred Yeats Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704Wilmington, Delaware |
I think you've given the term 'black humor' a new meaning LOL - you definitely have a talent - (I'm glad it's yours AND you're an engineer ~G~) (Think I'll avoid your trains - or don't you work for Amtrak? ) |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
LJA, I laughed myself to pieces on this one, guess I'll just have to pull my self together, and undertake to get back to work. Be well Kethry "It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures; but it is the loss that shapes the image, gathers the flowers weaves the garland."- |
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