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Formerly Alive
| Open Poetry #9 |
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Formerly Alive |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Formerly AliveA man beside me smiled today. My return, a delayed nod, at best. When did I lose my need to know to feel to touch others? The faces see what they will but I know these eyes, formerly alive, glistening from within are merely playing make believe. |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
Hi Meadowmuse, I have been here before, you speak of this dismay so very well though, I loved this thank you. Love, Cerenity "God doesn't have to be reminded that we exist. We have to be reminded that He exist!" (Writer Unknown) |
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ma miller Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 806 |
hi Claire ... a beautiful and thought provoking free form verse ... always a pleasure to read a pro's work ... |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
claire---now this is "inside looking out"---and if this is a personal view--I do have an Rx for ya...one cute little strappy black dress and a night out with serenity...grins...methinks it would be much fun! ----as always, your faithful fan... |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Claire, concise yet those few words speak volumes. Alone in a large crowd, such a trange feeling. excellent piece. "I concede relationships have left me weak Won't be here so I don't care Look for something worthy to replace my guilt" Mansun legacy |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Cerenity, my thanks to you this afternoon. I'm sorry to know you have experienced something of this nature, but am glad to "hear" you speak of it in past tense. Thanks for letting me know you can relate. M. A., Hi, thank you for reading. Your encouragement is most appreciated, my friend. (Did you see my note about our poetic role reversal?)  serenity, as a matter of fact, I just bought a little black dress and black heels but haven't had the occasion to enjoy them yet ... Give me time for a relaxing bath and manicure, and you're on! Brian, thank you for such a thoughtful answer, and for reading this piece so closely. ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Claire I feel like this all the time. Must be my lack of trust. I always questions the intentions of others...do they really like me or are they using me...perhaps not the feelings you are writing about but your poem brought these thoughts to my mind...James |
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Auguste 
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Claire, I know just where you're coming from with this one. You've done a very good job of describing just how it is we sometimes view others from our "own place." You know what I mean...take care, dear friend. Michael Proust- "Love is space and time measured by the heart" |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
Claire, we wonder sometimes when we lose the ability to trust. . . if only we could do it so poetically. . . Excellent piece my friend. . . -------------------------------------------------- That which gives light must endure burning --Victor Frankl |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Claire, you have penned what I just wanted to ... right this morning... I have been there at the receiving end ... so many times have I smiled and received nothing in return, but then what is the value or meaning of a smile that expects a smile to return? Thank you for writing this ... When did I lose my need to know to feel to touch others? .... and this happened this morning too.. cold stares meeting my happy face leaving me pondering if I was stinking or just had grown horns on my head  maybe I should look so deeply into things of daily life... just maybe...regards sudhir [This message has been edited by Sudhir Iyer (edited 09-01-2000).] |
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TerryW Senior Member
since 2000-03-23
Posts 779Louisville, Mississippi, USA |
Claire~ My dear, I seem to have been going through the same thing for the last couple of weeks. I know exactly what you mean in this poem. Sometimes, though, it is hard for me to keep up the make-believe. Thank you -- I loved this one. Love Ya! ~you reached inside, you touched my heart, and I am all the better for it~ Terry A. Woodson, Jr. |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
James, the feelings you describe...yes, I have had similar feelings of mistrust or questionable trust. I appreciate, always, knowing what kinds of feelings are evoked by something I have written. Thank you for sharing yours with me. Michael, yes, I do know what you mean, my friend, and I thank you. Sven, thank you for reading this one. Yes, so often trust is eroded away over time, and in a moment's flicker, we come to the sad realization that we have become emotionally closed, in some ways. Hopefully, though, the realization brings about a change, as awareness so often does. Sudhir, I wrote this piece primarily as an observation. A man smiled at me, and I did smile back, but realized at that moment, that I was so involved in my own thoughts, that I didn't recognize his friendliness with the openness that I once would have. In those few moments, I began thinking about how I arrived at that point, and the events that have contributed to my being there. It is through these moments of self awareness, I think, that one is able to begin to put together ideas for change. There was a time when I was the person smiling first, always. I hope and pray to find her again. I hope that my little poem here does not serve to promote to you the idea that people are "closed" and immune to your smile and cheerful disposition. Personally, I would love to have you share a smile with me...I don't know how anyone could not feel blessed by receiving a heartfelt smile from you, my friend. But the reality remains that so often we go about our day wrapped tightly in our own thoughts and immune to the warmth of others. This small poem is simply an observation and reflection of a moment of awareness. Please forgive my verbosity here, but I wanted to explain, and also to tell you that you deserve to have every day full of smiles, my friend. Thank you, sincerely, Sudhir. Terry, the make~believe becomes almost a part of who we are, as we continually pretend that things are alright, when in our hearts, we know they are not. It's so difficult, though, to keep our hearts open when so many events have battered them shut. Thank you so much for letting me know your thoughts upon reading this piece, Terry. Take care, ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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sonjes Senior Member
since 2000-02-18
Posts 564North Carolina |
"these eyes, formerly alive, glistening from within are merely playing make believe. " Oh...this is mournful. Almost as if the writer is trying to get out again, but can't bring herself to do it. I really hate having to pretend sometimes that there's nothing wrong...life is grand...ladadee. But, most of the time it is...so, what I am TRYING to say here is that your words are still beautiful no matter what you're writing... Don't care what people say Just follow your own way Don't give up and use the chance To return to innocence. -Enigma |
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