navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #9 » While You Sleep, Love
Open Poetry #9
Post A Reply Post New Topic While You Sleep, Love Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Tennessee Angel
Senior Member
since 2000-06-03
Posts 661
Tennessee

0 posted 2000-08-18 08:06 PM


I didn't want to say good-bye,
so I'm leaving while you sleep.
A picture of us and the memories
are the only things I'll keep.

In the morning, when you awake,
and there is no one next to you.
I hope you will realize
that I did what I had to do.

Lost in peaceful dreams,
I place a kiss upon your brow.
I will never let you go
if I don't leave this room right now.

You've been a part of me so long
and the only lover that I've known.
To imagine you with another
simply cuts me to the bone.

Would we have been as happy,
if we knew the end before.
I do not doubt you love me,
but I know that you love her more.

I heard you whisper in the phone
and tears your eyes did blur.
There was sadness when you said...
"I don't know how to tell her."

Maybe,had I not heard,
I could have continued the game.
But how can I hold you back
knowing you don't feel the same.

In order to spare my feelings,
you were loving two at a time.
But there are times when it is better
to be cruel than to be kind.

So while you sleep, I'll leave, Love,
and I'll quickly walk away.
And in the morning when you awake,
you'll arise to a brand new day.



--You can either take me as I am...or you can watch me as I go.--

© Copyright 2000 Stacy - All Rights Reserved
SpitFire
Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396

1 posted 2000-08-18 08:10 PM


~Oh my TA,...this is crawling around inside of me now. While you sleep is so soft and gentle and then the rest just stings. Very expressive of you. Great writing. Take care please. *Peace.
ladysixstring
Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 374

2 posted 2000-08-18 08:48 PM


You've captured the story of my first love.  First love... love... what a funny thought now, 16 years later. I was just a child.  What the hell was I thinking?  But it hurt like hell then.  Great job!!!  You brought back some long ago forgot memories...  I think I'll go stab my yearbook!!!

-jaimie
www.ladysixstring.com



Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871
Minnesota
3 posted 2000-08-18 08:51 PM


This isn't what I thought the poem was going to be about. How very sad, Tennessee Angel. Loving yet painful.

Elizabeth


Why ME???

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
4 posted 2000-08-18 10:07 PM


The pain is very evident here Angel. . . sometimes, we need to make that choice. . . no matter how much it hurts. . .

Simply wonderful. . .

-----------------------------------------------------

That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl


Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
5 posted 2000-08-18 11:53 PM


This brought tears to my eyes - for I've been in the same shoes once before in my life - I don't remember being as kind with my thoughts - but I left quietly all the same.
you've expressed this beautifully



ggrn3
Member
since 2000-08-17
Posts 433
Nahunta Georgia U.S.
6 posted 2000-08-19 12:41 PM


Angel
Very expressive.  Very emotional.  Your words I could actually picture. Love him enough to leave him.
Shows strength in the midst of quite a bit of pain.

Garfield

Jesse Jaymz
Senior Member
since 2000-01-24
Posts 708
Youngstown, ohio
7 posted 2000-08-19 01:02 AM


wow.  this made me cry.  i have done this.  this is me.  you have touched my heart with this.  please emial me.  great work.

Once upon a time there was a light in my life, now theres only love in the dark, There's nothing I can do, a total eclipse of the heart.

Tennessee Angel
Senior Member
since 2000-06-03
Posts 661
Tennessee
8 posted 2000-08-19 09:41 PM


Thank you all for your kind replies.  This wasn't what I had intended for this piece when I started, but as I wrote the words took on a life of their own.  I'm glad that you all enjoyed it.  Thanks!!    < !signature-->

--You can either take me as I am...or you can watch me as I go.--

[This message has been edited by Tennessee Angel (edited 08-19-2000).]

ddgoose
Member
since 2000-07-25
Posts 250
Baltimore, MD, USA
9 posted 2000-08-19 10:14 PM


Tennessee Angel

What beautiful words:
"I heard you whisper in the phone
and tears your eyes did blur.
There was sadness when you said...
"I don't know how to tell her"

I could feel the sadness and pain. I am sure that there are many people who have been there and heard something similar - great poem - well written.

didi



Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
10 posted 2000-08-19 11:41 PM


TA* Your work always touches my heart...this
one simply sang...selfless love.  
Beautifully woven~

Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
11 posted 2000-08-20 12:12 PM


Deeply painful...it hurts so much to let go sometimes...absolutely heart wrenching and beautiful work.  

*Krista Knutson*

"You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back."
-Barbara DeAngelis

EagleOne
Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829
Between a laugh and a tear...
12 posted 2000-08-20 02:00 AM


You express such love, pain , and strength with this, and you do it so well!

God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Unknown



Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
13 posted 2000-08-20 09:23 AM


heart wrenching... painful... sorrowful... well, parting is never fun...

an excellent poem here, tennessee...

regards,
sudhir

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
14 posted 2000-08-20 09:26 AM


Such strength gained from the terrible pain. This is indeed wonderful writing!
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #9 » While You Sleep, Love

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary