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Open Poetry #6
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Marina
Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245
Pickering, Ontario

0 posted 2000-02-23 03:27 PM





When all Is Said And Done


Upon first glance, you were all I ever needed
To hold you in my arms
Never listening to the warning my heart heeded
A silly sucker for your charms


A tainted touch that could tease beyond Abyss
Soft was the brush of your lying lips
That burnt me in fiery flames of the Jezebel’s kiss
In darkest of dangers my soul let me slip


Secure and soft a heart now harshly hardened
To a world that has no sun
Walk alone in a frozen garden
Where love’s seed grows no more
When all is said and done

Marina Feb 22/2000



© Copyright 2000 Marina Crossley - All Rights Reserved
mystery
Member
since 2000-02-21
Posts 79

1 posted 2000-02-23 03:43 PM


nice poem marina.
when the frozen garden thaws, a fresh love will bloom, one that will be better than before

Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
2 posted 2000-02-23 03:59 PM


Marina, the more I read it, the deeper messages appear. A very thought provoking poem.

James

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
3 posted 2000-02-23 04:36 PM


Spring will come and more love will grow, just wait and see.  Enjoyed your poem!
Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
4 posted 2000-02-23 06:14 PM


Marina,

Really liked this poem a lot. I have similar feelings about someone in my personal life, so I can relate to these feelings somewhat. Hope you find someone who is deserving of you. Great poem.

Amy

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

5 posted 2000-02-23 09:09 PM


This has such an edge to it! Great work, Marina.

 'Writing sharpens life;
life enriches writing'
Sylvia Plath

Marina
Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245
Pickering, Ontario
6 posted 2000-02-23 11:55 PM


Mystery,Martie,and Severn:  Thanks to all of you for your kind words.

Amy: Thank-you and thanks for your added comments they were very sweet.  I'll let you know when the real "Mr. Right" comes along.

Marina

jbowie
Member
since 2000-02-18
Posts 135
BANGOR (that OR) ME
7 posted 2000-02-24 12:17 PM


I felt this very strongly. You have a good talent with how you present your emotions. Somewhere there is the person worth a second look.

 A real man
kisses his children goodnight

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
8 posted 2000-02-24 04:49 AM


Marina~
Very nicely phrased.

When the rays of a new love's sun
pause to warm the ground wherein
the seeds are kept ...
hope will push it's curious head
to catch the glow.
Thus will spring a new love's bloom.

~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Marina
Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245
Pickering, Ontario
9 posted 2000-02-24 01:08 PM


James: Thank you and I'm sorry I forgot you in my last post.  Not that you could be easily forgotten.

Jbowie:  Thank you very much for your compliment and I hope I find that person soon.

Marge: Thank you for such a wonderful poem.


devina
Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539
Cali
10 posted 2000-02-24 01:36 PM


This is very thought provoking- this poem!! I love your imagery here Marina...the words are well put, I think we all can relate!!!

 Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...

Danny Holloway
Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034
Tulsa, OK
11 posted 2000-02-24 01:50 PM


Unharden that wounded heart,
allow another to come in
for love is a fickle thing
never know when will begin

Love is always a chance
maybe a roll of the dice
to give up holds no promise
so let it come around twice
______
Really enjoyed your poem! Hope there's sunshine in the northern.
Danny



jeremyc
Junior Member
since 2000-02-21
Posts 18

12 posted 2000-02-24 03:52 PM


very nice...and sad...i enjoyed it immensely  good work
Marina
Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245
Pickering, Ontario
13 posted 2000-02-24 06:36 PM


devina: Thanks...if you going to verbaly bash an ex, you might as well use good imagery!

Danny: Thank you for such a lovely poem.

jeremyc: Thank you too.

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

14 posted 2000-02-24 11:06 PM


Beautifully done, Marina!  

Denise

Marina
Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245
Pickering, Ontario
15 posted 2000-02-25 12:53 PM


Denise: Thank you
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

16 posted 2000-02-25 01:10 AM


Marina,
I really enjoyed your poem, though bitter. It perfectly encapsules (is that even a word?) the pain and anger and regret and lost longing of a dead relationship, cracked love in little broken pieces all over the place. What I learned is the way to happiness is finding yourself -- if you prop yourself against anyone, you'll slip sometime. I hope things work out for you, and thanks for posting.

Mike

Marina
Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245
Pickering, Ontario
17 posted 2000-02-25 11:59 AM


Mike: Thank you for your kind words.  Yes things did work out...I dump him.  The best thing I ever did!

Marina

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