Open Poetry #6 |
The Calm |
Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
Luna's orb in silence creeps, ...across night's cloudless sky, Past the starry sentinels, ...Orion's muted cry, Solemn silence cloaks the land, ...nature in repose, Summer breeze in noiseless hush, ...upon the earth bestows, Eternal benediction, ...on man and beast as one, Immortal absolution, ...as final day is done. |
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© Copyright 2000 Mike - All Rights Reserved | |||
doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
Mike, this is wonderful in both syntax and feeling... you truly have a gift of words. I've seen you use this same type of structure before, with every other line starting with "...". I'm not familiar with many classic poetry structure; does this fall into some certain catagory? Just curious. Doesn't really matter when it comes down to it. It's lovely. Thought you might know something I could learn, that's all. Excellent work, my friend. -dp |
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Rex Allen McCoy Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863Sippin a Timmy's in London |
forces one to stop and think I like it Rex}<{{{{o> |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
You know, this did make me calm! Lovely, lovely poem. But then, all your work is... thank you, I needed this today. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Words of firmament emerge ...in poetic mastery. I think you like the night, Mike. You write so often of it, and so well. |
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christies heart Member
since 1999-08-10
Posts 189NJ, USA |
This is so well done...is it supposed to make me feel sad? It did in that reflective way. I love it. |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
So beautiful...this is definitely poetic mastery...lovely work. *Krista Knutson* One lives in the hope of becoming a memory. ~*Antonio Porchia*~ |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
Thank you all kindly for the comments. Doreen, I know very little if anything about poetic structure. Wouldn't know iambic from prehistoric. I write solely from feel and my ... justs feels right to me. *smile* Martie, probably shouldn't say this, or I might get committed, but when I was young, I would sneak outside in the middle of the night and lay on my back and stare at the stars for hours. Yes, I enjoy the night. |
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Ted Reynolds Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 331 |
Well, Mike, it reads like you still do lie out under the stars, and that's nothing for a poet to be ashamed of. I do sometimes, but not tonight, there's a foot of snow. The word "final" in the last line, taken literally, adds an almost scary/holy new meaning to the poem. Intended? |
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Tasi Junior Member
since 2000-02-08
Posts 38Canada |
Mike I feel a need to go and lie out underneath the stars I could almost hear the crickets chirping if not for all the snow...great work Tasi |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Oh, Mike- With my fascination for the night skies, this one took my breath away. I do the same as you, for hours looking to see 'beyond'. I'm never disappointed with the view. This will become one of my favorites for sure. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Mike, in these few brief and beautiful lines you have so tenderly encompassed what most of us spend our lifetimes trying to describe, and I am in complete awe of the reverence this poem evokes. I've never read finer work. Claire |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Splendiferous.. |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
Thank you very much for the comments. Coming from such gifted poets, I am humbled. |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Perfect title for this one, Mike! This piece exudes calmness (is that a word?) Very beautiful! Denise |
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freckles Member
since 2000-02-12
Posts 160Virginia USA |
Beautiful work, Mike. I hope to see more of your poetry as I have more time to come here. |
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Gemini Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203Wisconsin, USA |
Mike, you paint a lovely sky. If it weren't so cloudy tonight, I'd be looking up right now. |
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CMGrimm Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685USA |
Wow...so many people. All gifted in the art of words. All with the same splendid fascination with the heavens above. "It's a small world afterall" Hey Mike, does Orion look the same from your place as it does from my back porch? Always wondered....just thought I'd ask. Splendid poem Mike, absolutely wonderful. Will be looking for your posts in the future. Thanks Chris |
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