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Open Poetry #6
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California

0 posted 2000-04-03 04:48 PM


THE OCEAN


On a cold Winter's night by the river walking,
Talking to myself, doing this just fine.
By the mouth where the soft waters tingle,
Intermingle with the ocean, divine.
Though warmly dressed I began quivering,
Shivering as I stared out to the sea.
Silent and eerie, dead and dreary.
How ominous it seemed to be.

The breeze blew cold and then blew colder.
Older I felt as if by reprise.
My candle flickered and I winced,
Convinced somehow this sea had eyes.
The fire not a glare or gleam giving,
Living, solely, a symbol of light,
Set my mind to wander, sincerely ponder
The eminencies of night.

Still staring on into the stilling,
Chilling channels of the dark and deep.
The wind wrought its wrath upon me, willing.
Enthrilling my heart with the sky's weep.
As every vow or value I ever held,
Or felt compelled somehow to try and keep,
Along with shame, the candle and flame
Were unmercifully thrown to the deep.
Given their eternal sleep.


But with tempestuous winds emerging,
Purging the ocean of all it despised.
With the pelting rains of coldness calling,
Falling from a sky misprized.
Enveloped in the darkness, obscure,
Demure, peaceful, tranquil, refined,
The embellished sea lie still for me
And my name, whimpered and whined.

In utter shock I stood there, stalling.
Calling me, still, the voices arose.
Whence in the ocean I beheld drifting,
Lifting my spirits, a single rose.
Ah, such beauty, so sweet, so pure,
Surely I would not let be drown nor froze.
So it came to be, I stepped unto the sea
For the love of a virgin white rose.

Following the flower, the waves riding,
Abiding to its inevident will.
I walked on the water, never sinking,
Thinking to myself how odd, how ill.
Coming closer I reached down grasping,
Clasping tightly the treasured prize.
Blood spewing dripping, the flesh ripping
As razor sharp thorns began to incise.
The night's echo amplifying my cries.


With pain I was incapable of bearing
Tearing through my aching, hollow soul.
I dropped the flower I loved so dearly,
Clearly now paying the ocean's toll.
The voices of the sea now began laughing,
Quaffing at my sole demise,
As I turned for shore, seeing land no more.
The black sea touching the blackened skies.

I knew no stars this night were glowing,
Showing me the way in which I'd fled.
And, indeed, with no sense of direction,
Reflection rolled rampant through my head.
Oh, the weakness I displayed being taken,
Forsaken by the flower of the sea.
This pervious sea, and yet not to me.
This pernicious entity.

Astounded by such an act of treason,
Reason I searched for in my head.
Why the candle and rose were displaced,
Erased to the eternal depths of the dead.
Why the wicked water, devoid of caring,
On sparing me was seemingly bent.
Then fearing for my life, with endearing strife,
I ran with all human extent,
Feeling the ocean's ungodly intent.


In the direction I was fleeing,
Seeing no resemblance of land.
Stopped, I, for the sake of breathing,
Seething at the sea's sadistic hand.
With every ounce of hope diminished,
Replenished by ill-fated fears,
I lay on the placid ocean of acid,
Vowing no more tears.

It was then I noticed the ghost ship sailing,
Hailing some incanescent light.
With not a glare or gleam giving,
Living solely an adornment of Night.
It was seemingly anchored, the waves riding.
Abiding to the ocean's every will.
Never proceeding, never receding,
Forever sailing, setting still.

I wondered what they must be after,
In laughter at unconscious reiteration.
But all thoughts and words lay unspoken,
Broken, the infernal brine's intimidation.
Whence in the water I beheld drifting,
Lifting my spirits, a single rose.
Ah, such beauty, so sweet and pure.
Surely I would not let be drown nor froze.
Such a beautiful virgin white rose.

Michael Anderson



[This message has been edited by Michael (edited 04-04-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Michael Anderson - All Rights Reserved
Xeonox
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764
CA, USA
1 posted 2000-04-03 05:51 PM


You got in deep. You go Bro.  
Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
2 posted 2000-04-03 06:18 PM


Michael, the wounds a rose can impart are long to heal. This was a wonderfull deep reflection of life. Beauty.

Parker

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

3 posted 2000-04-03 06:34 PM


Loved this--as beautiful as you've ever written--and my turn to say--loved the ending!  INCREDIBLE.
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
4 posted 2000-04-03 08:20 PM


I read this earlier at work, but didn't respond then as it really blew me away. The power, energy and feelings in this poem are incredible. I would never be able to choose one of yours as my favorite - they are all too good.  
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
5 posted 2000-04-03 09:46 PM


If I had to describe your work in one word, I'd have to say "INTENSITY"... This is astounding, Michael..
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
6 posted 2000-04-03 09:50 PM


Michael~

The rhyming scheme in this piece
is absolutely awesome.
I'm reading it over and over again,
enjoying each morsel.

You are quite brilliant, my friend.
Looking through your eyes - your soul
I see beyond where I am.

You need to submit this to as many
places as you can find to submit it.

It reached in and grasped my inner-most
feelings ... shattering all other thoughts.
Now, that's power from the poet !
~*Marge*~




 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
7 posted 2000-04-03 09:56 PM


I agree. Extremely intense with a Poe-like eerie quality to it..makes for very gripping reading.
Mike
Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462

8 posted 2000-04-03 10:56 PM


*Applause*
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
9 posted 2000-04-03 11:55 PM


Sharon and Nan and all of them said it all!
poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646
Arkansas
10 posted 2000-04-03 11:58 PM


Well, I just can't sit here after reading this, and not comment...(catching breath)...
I ditto Marge - every word she said - intensity at it's finest...if ever I've seen into your soul, it is now.
Your words painted the blackest of eerie waters in my head...I could *hear* your panic.  Astounding, yes, submit this...I'd say it's your best ever.  I've never had a poem pull me in like this one did, and I'm serious when I say that.  Bravo!

Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
11 posted 2000-04-04 12:22 PM


Ditto to all the above comments Michael!  You've opened your flood gates with this one.
Amazing work my friend!!!    I applaud you..

 There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self...
~Isis~
(Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit)



Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
12 posted 2000-04-04 07:12 AM


Xeonox, Indeed, got in over my head on this one I think.

Parker, hard wounds to heal, indeed, especially when one never stops grabbing where he knows the wounds will reopen.

Nan, I would probably describe my emotional state on a daily basis as Intense.  But for you to say such about my work is quite a compliment... thank you.

Marge, I am glad you picked up on the rhyme scheme here, that was quite a challenge in itself.  I would like to touch up the meter a bit, then I will probably submit this.  As always, the feeling must come first though, you have paid me the ultimate compliment.

Balladeer, well, you certainly know how to humble me.  Poe being my absolute favorite writer, ya know.  Thank you.

Gen, Yeah, I think my soul was laid pretty bare in this one.  Was not an easy one to write from an analytical nor from an emotional vantage point...

Isis, Me thinks so too, just kind of wading around in the flood waters now...LOL  Thank you my Partner in Crime.


Thank you all for the kind replies.


Michael


hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
13 posted 2000-04-04 10:49 AM


Brillant  
Mistikman
Senior Member
since 2000-01-10
Posts 682
San Jose, CA, USA
14 posted 2000-04-04 05:29 PM


Wow Michael, I havent had much time lately for poetry, but I am glad I stumbled in here for this one. This was phenominal Michael, and I dare say the best I have read from you.
LoveBug
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697

15 posted 2000-04-04 08:04 PM


This is so beautiful, I'm at a loss for words! This poem touched me deeply...

 "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

16 posted 2000-04-05 03:05 PM


Still staring on into the stilling,
Chilling channels of the dark and deep.
The wind wrought its wrath upon me, willing.
Enthrilling my heart with the sky's weep.
As every vow or value I ever held,
Or felt compelled somehow to try and keep,
Along with shame, the candle and flame
Were unmercifully thrown to the deep.
Given their eternal sleep.

But with tempestuous winds emerging,
Purging the ocean of all it despised.
With the pelting rains of coldness calling,
Falling from a sky misprized.
Enveloped in the darkness, obscure,
Demure, peaceful, tranquil, refined,
The embellished sea lie still for me
And my name, whimpered and whined.
------------------
Following the flower, the waves riding,
Abiding to its inevident will.
I walked on the water, never sinking,
Thinking to myself how odd, how ill.
Coming closer I reached down grasping,
Clasping tightly the treasured prize.
Blood spewing dripping, the flesh ripping
As razor sharp thorns began to incise.
The night's echo amplifying my cries.


With pain I was incapable of bearing
Tearing through my aching, hollow soul.
I dropped the flower I loved so dearly,
Clearly now paying the ocean's toll.
The voices of the sea now began laughing,
Quaffing at my sole demise,
As I turned for shore, seeing land no more.
The black sea touching the blackened skies.
-----------------------
I wondered what they must be after,
In laughter at unconscious reiteration.
But all thoughts and words lay unspoken,
Broken, the infernal brine's intimidation.
Whence in the water I beheld drifting,
Lifting my spirits, a single rose.
Ah, such beauty, so sweet and pure.
Surely I would not let be drown nor froze.
Such a beautiful virgin white rose.
-------------------

M, its taken me days to decide what to say about this one...basicly I'm still at a loss.
EXCEPTIONAL...positively. Perfection...no question.
Intense...absolutely.  Pure Depth ...most definalty.
one of your best... no doubt. Also one of your most powerful and honest of soul.
It is a gifted and rare poet who can peel back so many layers and go so deep...you bled divinely in this one...leaving us all awestruck...once again.(smile)
take care, jm

 ...when you walked into the room, I saw their faces,
you made it feel like time was standing still...and I felt fascination...
then you turned and smiled in my direction...
and my heart...gave me away.
glass tiger

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
17 posted 2000-04-05 03:12 PM


This sounds like a poem only Michael could write. You have no end of imagination. You pull the reader right in with you.This was astounding.
Excellent
Liz

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
18 posted 2000-04-05 03:52 PM


This one tugs the reader right in like a rip tide... Wonderful work, Michael!
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