Absence of devotion.... - pipTalk Forums

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Open Poetry #6

Absence of devotion....

The Jackal
Member

since 1999-08-13

Posts 426
Springfield, Massachusetts U.S.A

0 posted 2000-03-28 11:54 PM

So i admit i got lost among emotions
and i
repent..the absence of devotion
and i have spent the 19 years
living within reason..thriving and leaving
im a watcher..i live in wait
proving and accusing
everyone of making..all my honest mistakes

CherylLynnMckee
Member

since 2000-03-28

Posts 215

1 posted 2000-03-29 12:39 PM

Your poem makes you think..and haven't we all blamed others for are own mistakes..honest ones or not.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

2 posted 2000-03-29 12:50 PM

and i have spent the 19 years
living within reason..thriving and leaving
im a watcher..i live in wait
proving and accusing
everyone of making..all my honest mistakes
----------

jackal, this is SO great...and so typically you...your unique talent for speaking SO much emotion in so few powerful words...
I love the irony and confession in this...
very well written.
take care,

Do you live by the book, do you play by the rules
Do you care what is thought by others about you
If this day is all that is promised to you
Do you live for the present, the future the past...
tracy chapman

mete out
Member

since 2000-02-16

Posts 270
england

3 posted 2000-03-30 06:02 AM

***Jackel,
Wow, this really made me think.
A fantastic poem, so much said in a short space of time.

Congratulations.

I am not a preacher, I just speak the world as I see it.

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

4 posted 2000-03-30 09:44 AM

It's good to see you back...much said in very few words

Denise

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-08-22

Posts 22648

5 posted 2000-03-30 09:51 AM

This is great, Jackal! Well done!

Denise

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

6 posted 2000-03-31 12:25 PM

Good poem...I've experienced an absence of devotion also...nice to read you again.

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