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Open Poetry #6
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Into the Darkness(Inspired by wayoutwalt)
| Open Poetry #6 |
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Into the Darkness(Inspired by wayoutwalt) |
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Mistikman Senior Member
since 2000-01-10
Posts 682San Jose, CA, USA |
Into the darkness I walk with head held high That horrible place where hope goes to die Devoid of all that is good and right A world that is bathed in eternal night The path to this land is paved with sorrow The kind that blocks sight of tomorrow Riding on the horse named depression Traveling like a funeral procession This is a trip never made by choice A trip for those who had no voice Those who obey and do as they are told Now I make the journey, alone and cold Demons of hate and anger prey on the weak This is not a place for the fragile or meek To travel here, you must have wits about you Without them, you shalt never make it through Of this land there are only two ways out One is redemption for those without doubt The other is a grave one indeed Suicide, for those who choose to bleed I shall make it through, for I am strong The trip is dangerous, and the path is long But once before, I traveled this land And its tortures I can surely withstand |
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| © Copyright 2000 Travis Welton - All Rights Reserved | |||
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christies heart Member
since 1999-08-10
Posts 189NJ, USA |
Very well done. I can relate to and feel the emotions in this. Grant that I may not judge my niegbor until I have walked a mile in his moccasians Native American prayer |
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Mistikman Senior Member
since 2000-01-10
Posts 682San Jose, CA, USA |
christies heart- Well thank you, heh, at least someone liked this  |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Make it two, mistik. This is excellent writing. I really enjoy the way you weave the phrases together...although I'm not sure I'd want to be the inspiration for it. Poor Walt! |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Excellent writing! This is wonderful! Very well done! Denise |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
The dark side...very well written! Sounds a cold and lonely road, you've described with excellence! |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
My young friend, this is one of your best! Very good writing!  |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
o boo hoo woe is me im depressed nononono yuhuyuhy heheh mistik requested my repost o in to the darkness which made me feel top o the world and look how great he did on his version (jealous) |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
I really enjoyed the way you wrote this one. Nice job |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
I agree with much of the sentiment in this poem. I know the feeling behind it all too well. I must say that suicide is the only "eternal darkness" though. That should never even be considered an option in my book, lest you carry your pain with you forever. Excellent portrayel of the path of Darkness I see you trod, though. Good job. Michael |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
This is a wonderful poem! Keep up the good work! "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde |
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Mistikman Senior Member
since 2000-01-10
Posts 682San Jose, CA, USA |
Balladeer- Heh, thanks The idea for this was from the title of the poem walt recently reposted Denise- Why thank you WhtDove- The coldest and lonliest I have ever traversed, for sure. Thanks. Poet deVine- Thanks, I think so too hoot_owl_rn- Thanks. Michael- Well, I meant that the land of darkness is eternal night, when you leave it, you are no longer in it, but the world still exists, even if hidden away, for me at least. Suicide isnt really a choice any more than giving up is a choice. The choice to bleed is not one that someone would intentionally make, it is one made out of desperation to end the horrible trek. Thanks for the response, and I hope I cleared up a few of my meanings in this poem LoveBug- Thank you, I will |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Your inspiration serves you well. Darkness is a concept I'm wholly familiar with. You've done much here to capture some of its essence! |
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