Open Poetry #5 |
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It whispered I love you |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla ![]() |
It whispered I love you As light as fairy dust, the breeze, Loomed above my face with ease. Passing other occupants And touching me with transient. It circled me breathing whisper, Ever getting fuller crisper. Until it laid a velvet touch. Until it seem to me too much. It's then I felt a bit enchanted, Avid yet a little languid. Receptive yet a little fearful, Cheerful yet a little mindful. It held me in an objects grace, Of a warm and loving embrace. And placed me in a stasis mood. Were frankly I became unglued. For I heard the lightest whisper, "I love you," That Pierced my heart and mind clear through. |
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© Copyright 2000 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved | |||
hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
I absolutely had to read this one aloud Seymore...I love the way the words dance off my toung. The rhythm is great!! Nice poem, well written ![]() |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Hoot, I would love to hear that hoot from a hoot owl. *L* Sy |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Great poem, Sy. It has almost a tangible aspect to it, very descriptive. Very enjoyable. Michael |
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HelmutB Senior Member
since 2000-01-06
Posts 964Canada |
The flow of words entangled touch soft and smooth....oh so much As a painter i can see the canvas Is full of "she" As a Poet(careful now ![]() you make your words shine like rays Helmut The ability to describe life with words is similar to painting a picture; both can be powerful tools. |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
You do have a way with words... Very nicely done. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Michael, Thank you for the very nice comment. Helmut, Thank you for the answering poem. Mike, And thank you for the nicely done. |
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devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
You could have painted this one across the sky with your beautiful words, you are quite a talent dear. ![]() Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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Marge Tindal![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
And I whisper *this is lovely*. |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Marge, So nice to see you whispering again. Liz Sy, This poem itself whispers, it is you that has laid a velvet touch upon the page. Exquisite! Liz |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
A beautiful whisper of love! Truly beautiful, Seymour! ![]() Denise |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Well, now Sy..... Lookee this - Lots of great imagery - simile, metaphor, personification - all that good stuff..... oh - and I great poem too.... ![]() |
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Felix Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 78USA |
This poem made me feel as though I was walking barefoot through a beautifully enchanted forest!! And I consider that the best way to say "I love you"...lightly and quietly and to not make a fuss. For it's the small singly noted things that give the most meaning I think. Did you ever read about a frog who dreamed of being a king, and then became one? - Neil Diamond |
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Betty Gravitt Member
since 1999-09-11
Posts 222Georgia United States |
"That pierced my heart and mind clear through". You seem to be telling my story again Seymour. I know these feelings well. ![]() B Gravitt [This message has been edited by Betty Gravitt (edited 01-08-2000).] |
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moonmoon Member
since 1999-08-13
Posts 277TX , USA |
Wow, what an enchanting accord of words...Liked much.. ![]() |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
....and the hits keep right on rolling. A very nice touch on this one, Sy. |
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whiskey![]()
since 1999-12-28
Posts 1278Australia |
WoW Sy this is wonderful so beautiful and rolls so easilly of the tongue. Well done This is great ![]() |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Well now sir, I have come full circle to know why that reason I would like to whisper, aye! Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?...KRJ |
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Marge Tindal![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
This whisper needs to be shared again ! ![]() ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
I have heard it too, Sweet Sy. Lovely writing. ![]() I will not bend to the cowardice of a silent judgement. |
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TexUS Member
since 2003-03-20
Posts 228 |
A masterpiece. Really, really enjoyed it, THANKS! |
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