Open Poetry #5 |
Falling Awake |
Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Falling AwakeSoft shadows on the window's sill as daylight's drawn a ragged breath Low calling of the whippoorwill first signs of spring amidst scents of death Finely fragrant, as dogwood teases the moistened morning's vision Succintly savors and somehow sees o'er the nearing apparition Draw nigh, come forth lost labouring soul, encumber not Perdition Unburden the sallow, ponderous load swelling full with each confession Lilt lightly upward, newly borne, all grace and tenderness bestowing Embrace the cockcrow, the sudden morn... your Freedom's come with Knowing. Claire |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Delightful. The title drew me in ... what a subtle play on words. Then, slowly I was awakened by the imagery. Wonderful, Claire. MeadowMuse at play. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Artur Hawkwing Member
since 1999-06-30
Posts 444USA |
I feel very priveleged to be reading this. Of beauty and enchantment it spoke. Spring is easy to welcome, for it is a venerable season. At least I hope I understood if this is what you intended to write about. |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Marge...Thanks for reading...so glad you enjoyed it. Artur...thank you. I can understand your visioning of Spring as it does have elements of springtide references. I wrote this actually as an expression of beginning life toward a different light, in the midst of grief, mostly as a reassurance to myself that I could persevere...a springtide of my own, perhaps? Thank you for your kind comments. Claire |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Freedom comes with knowing--what true words Claire. This poem was so lovely, I went back to read it out loud because the words just sounded so good. In the dew of little things, the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. (ee cummings) |
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merely_a_jester Member
since 2000-01-14
Posts 67Arkansas... that's all you get |
first off, i like the title second off, i love the words i tip my cap merely_a_jester |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Martie...I love poetry read aloud, and I am honored that you felt inclined to read mine. Thank you for letting me know that you enjoyed it. jester...gee, thanks! Claire |
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whiskey
since 1999-12-28
Posts 1278Australia |
Clarie this is beautiful such wonderful imagery , You awakened me this morning with a lovely poem |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Oh, how true..."Your freedom's come with Knowing". Beautiful and well done, Claire! Denise And slight is the sting of his trouble Whose winnings are less than his worth; For he who is honest is noble, Whatever his fortunes or birth.~~~Alice Cary, ~Nobility~ |
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Astraea Member
since 1999-11-09
Posts 378California! Yeah! Okay, I'm done now |
Another lovely one. ~Astraea "Sometimes stars can only be seen in darkness." "Sorrow's crown of sorrow is remembering happier things." |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
meadowmuse, I thought this poem was about a child being born. Your thoughts at times are just slightly elusive and make for any number of interpretations. I love that quality. Now I'm off to read again knowing your thoughts in writing it It is so lovely, as is all of your poetry Liz |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Whiskey, Denise, Astraea, Liz...thank you, all, for your kind responses...you folks are awfully nice. Liz...I'm afraid a lot of my work is vague and/or elusive, but I try to temper it with as much "normalcy" as possible...lol Thanks for reading Claire |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
I have to agree that the title got my attention... and the poem kept it... Very nicely done, Claire - I'm enjoying your work lots... |
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Rus Bowden Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 139 |
Hi Claire, I read this on an dya when it does me good. Thank you. Love your care with words, seasons, nature and scents. Super poem. Rus |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Meadow, Good job, well done, enjoyed the read. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Wonderful read, Meadow, love the flow and sentiment. |
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HelmutB Senior Member
since 2000-01-06
Posts 964Canada |
Feels like a kiss from the muse If my German word "Muse" is the same in English Enchanting and inviting poesy Well the words..catching breath Loved the presentaion of the poem Thank you |
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HelmutB Senior Member
since 2000-01-06
Posts 964Canada |
Feels like a kiss from the muse If my German word "Muse" is the same in English Enchanting and inviting poesy Well the words..catching breath Loved the presentaion of the poem Thank you The two replies where unintentionally but the poem is worth it in any way ups < !signature--> The ability to describe life with words is similar to painting a picture; both can be powerful tools. [This message has been edited by HelmutB (edited 01-16-2000).] |
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RobertB Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104Champaign, IL |
An excellent poem!!! Very nice. Robert |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
Oh wow, this is so lovely Meadowmuse. I love how your poetry can be intrepreted in so many ways..it makes it all the more appealing. Truly beautiful work. *Krista Knutson* ~*Like a lion, without fear of the howling pack, Like a gust of wind, ne'er trapped in a snare, Like a lotus blossom, ne'er sprinkled by water, Let me, like a unicorn, in solitude roam.*~ Hymn Of Buddha |
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Anne Member
since 1999-12-31
Posts 78 |
You are so talented!!! I adore this one! |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Thank you, all, for your very kind and encouraging comments. I'm glad there was something about this poem that you enjoyed. Claire |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Lovely! Such beautiful imagery! |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
I'm not in with all the proper terms for criticing poems. But I must say that I am always amazed at how you weave your words together. Another very wonderfull poem. Parker |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Poet deVine...Thank you, so glad you liked this one. Parker...Thank you for letting me know what you thought of this. I appreciate your comments, and as long as you say what you mean, then you're doing just fine, to my way of thinking! Claire |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Wow...great (somewhat mysterious) piece. My mind is going all sorts of directions after reading this. Michael |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Michael, thank you! Those directions are the best response you could have given me Claire |
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