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Rough Draft
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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Rough Draft |
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drummerboy678 Member
since 2003-10-28
Posts 134 |
This is the first, very rough draft of a poem I need for my creative writing class. I just wanted to post it and get comments before I start revision. (I know the puncuation is terrible). I'm also going to add another section, dealing, ironically what the title and topic of the prompt is, World Peace. Thanks World Peace? Stereotyped, uncaring concerns, Ms. USA answers what do we care, about the world outside our satiated cocoon? Our knowledge of the world only of the poor **** on page 27 of the latest National Geographic. “Poor little fellow”, now where is the TV guide? Concern? Until our stomachs scream for food, and our brain’s respond with a "sorry" -----(I know I need to work on this line) Until our eyes see death, without the glassy screen of the TV to shield us, Until we experience the world outside our own, will we ever truly know. So tell me, how probable is Ms. USA's request of "World peace and ending hunger", when we all just want someone to pass us the TV Guide? Thanks for the comments.... I'll post back tommorrow with an update, but its due monday, so I wanted some advice before then. Thank you. [This message has been edited by drummerboy678 (11-30-2003 12:54 AM).] |
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