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Critical Analysis #2
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crimson
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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crimson |
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ronald might Junior Member
since 2008-06-05
Posts 19 |
We learnt of truth, yet our hearts seek to be fooled. less i swaddle in grieve, i'll have you with me. Fist sized thick crimson red veins only to hold such fruitless passions! Even thoughts and time couldnt escape your bloody arrest! A truthful tale of tragedy i must say. Whence he came, light has never been this faint. But i've you with me, my fist sized thick crimson red! Without you, time wouldnt have his justice only to tick and never have his peace. Oh thank you my crimson red! For faint light fooled judgement you brought aspiration Hope Whence he came light has never been this faint oh you my crimson red |
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| © Copyright 2008 ronald might - All Rights Reserved | |||
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chopsticks Senior Member
since 2007-10-02
Posts 888The US, |
Who knows, but I’ll bet the University of Alabama would love this poem . |
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ronald might Junior Member
since 2008-06-05
Posts 19 |
haha..i'm not entirely sure about them lovin' it.. but just a little worried about sarcasium in the body? im afraid readers might find this to be a satire instead of my intend, an angry soul tired of hoping for the better. how bout the title? my brother finds the use of crimson to decribe heart to be cliche! but i like it..do you think there is an alternative? stranger passing by, |
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ronald might Junior Member
since 2008-06-05
Posts 19 |
help for the title? anyone?! |
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Brad Member Ascendant
since 1999-08-20
Posts 5705Jejudo, South Korea |
My first guess is that you need to go back and rewrite the specifics down first. Your problems with the title are probably the result that you haven't written down what you're really writing about, you're writing around it. The next step with then be metaphor. Things tend to clear up when you start that way. |
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