»
Archives
»
Critical Analysis #2
»
Look Into The Mirror
| Critical Analysis #2 |
|
Look Into The Mirror |
|
|
trutodaraiders Senior Member
since 2006-12-02
Posts 820CA 
|
Hi I was wanting some help on this poem as far as the Meter is concerened. I think I am meter deaf. Any suggestions would be nice Your thoughts are welcomed. Thank You, Bill When I look into the mirror I don't like what I see, Just an emptiness inside, A view of only me. The image still remains Of this hollow lonely soul, And the circumstance I find, which I simply can't control. When I look into the mirror Tis only me I view, Alone inside my world, Yet tortured without you. Then I look beyond my image To see your nearing face, Once sighted it's an image I never will erase. When I look into the mirror I see you standing near, I feel your body's touch, I feel your pain, love and tears. I feel the hand of God Caress my aching heart, And I see into your soul, And know we'll never be apart. Now I look into the mirror, I no longer look away, Because I now see vivid colors, Where I once saw only gray. Now I long to see the image For no beauty does it lack, For when I look into the mirror, I see your beauty looking back. Poetry is just the evidence of life. If your life is burning well, poetry is just the ash. " Leon Cohen~ |
||
| © Copyright 2007 Bill Franklin - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
trutodaraiders Senior Member
since 2006-12-02
Posts 820CA |
No help here?? This is a rough place to get advise! |
||
|
rhia_5779 Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334California |
advice* i am convinced if you are looking into the mirror you would see yourself right? But you allude to anothers beauty than seeing it? why don't you clear that up feel your pain, love and tears. The rythmn was pretty good but there it stopped. Try taking out either Pain or TEARs |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
