My Tears( How does this one sound everyone?)

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Critical Analysis #2

My Tears( How does this one sound everyone?)

Abiola
Junior Member

since 2006-08-09

Posts 29

0 posted 2006-09-15 05:44 PM

The tears that passes down these cheeks are just to let

you see what I see

I always thought you would have been here to wipe them

away but everytime I look at you you let me know you not here

You tell me don't worry, everything is going to be okay,

that you'll come rescue me

but everytime you near you let me know you not here.

My tears is what i see, what you see, and what will always be

so don't 4get it!!!

My tears are here drowning in the ocean

Catch them let them be free once again!!!!!!!!!!

Don't let them drift away

If you do don't worry

I know my tears are not important to you...

But they will always be

My tears!!!!!!

*********Abi aka WiSdOm***********

moonbeam

Member Elite

since 2005-12-24

Posts 2356

1 posted 2006-09-15 05:53 PM

10 lines out of 16 with I me or my in them.

Not good for a beginner.

What's the 4 for?

There is absolutely nothing new about this poem, nothing to interest me at all.

Try reading what I just posted to Rhea's poem.

Best.

M

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