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Critical Analysis #2
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themute
Member
since 2006-05-08
Posts 469
Maryland

0 posted 2006-05-10 03:53 PM



A baby died when it was borne
Her face was white and blue and always ignored
Her eyes were squinting as if in pain
She’s works on corners and has no name
Her hair is blond and the roots are black
She dies every morning when the sun comes back
It’s the only thing that ever has for her
She lives in the rooms that say please don’t disturb

And one day she woke up to a man knocking on her door
He said she no longer had to work anymore
She was free from hell and free from nothing
He touched her hand and she woke up crying
The tears they fell like rain but her husband heard them falling
And he kissed her on the lips and she cried there even harder
She thought she lived a dream, but she’s just a baby martyr

She was born into death and lived in sadness
Oh what a melancholy gladness
She had this in her soul

The hell she lived was meant to compensate
For the heaven she received
But she didn’t realize that she was always really dead
And she never really lived her life; it was always just a dream
She died and was forgotten and then left there on the floor
Why was she ever born?


© Copyright 2006 Matthew Patrick Holbert - All Rights Reserved
kadafi09
Member
since 2003-06-17
Posts 143
California, United States
1 posted 2006-05-20 01:15 PM


This piece is deep. It makes me think of all those people just existing and never living. I really enjoyed the structure of the poem and the flow and cadence of it, I thought both were really adequate and added, never retracted, from the poem as a whole. great work overall and please do write more cause you're great.

the sun setting over turlock,
where we hustle for change/
the converted remain/
loyal to the drug dealers

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