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Critical Analysis #2
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Depression Hurts
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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Depression Hurts |
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elpoeta Junior Member
since 2006-01-17
Posts 15Puerto Rico |
Depression Hurts In my dreams… I hear the whisper of death standing still he slowly strangles the last of my will I awake with a gray haze confusing my skull Lackluster and black, everything dull Continue on? No one tells me how This demon within has taken a vow To destroy my will to fight To take away my sleep filled nights Thoughts that run at incredible speed Verbal assaults on those we most need I sit still in a four dimensional world Hope is lying dead, next to me And to bring hope back I need only take two Xanax. Only through this cycle of medication Will there ever exist vindication For all my guilty sins I don’t care at this point who wins Zoloft fights the Clonopin And the Clonopin fights the Doxepin While both get together with Geodon And turn my brain into fried eggs with ham Making me lose all notion of who I am This depression is causing so much pain As the pills I take alter my brain Although I find I still feel the same Could hope be alive if I had taken cocaine? So many thoughts lead to a panic attack Oh no, I need another Xanax! So that I can again feel relaxed Do I really need doctors watching my back? Why is something like panic attacking me? My only dream was a dream to be free And now I dream of things that can’t be Like love and hope eluding me Death and fear attacking me Depression, slowly taking over me Depression hurts. |
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| © Copyright 2006 Michael Rodriguez - All Rights Reserved | |||
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gelato Member
since 2005-10-27
Posts 63TN,USA |
The expression comes through...one of deep depression. So does the idea of the person in the poem trying to "make it better" by using all sorts of pills...one to relax, etc. I enjoyed the poem very much. : ) "Relationships are the one tangible connection we have with God" - Purpose Driven Life |
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LifeSinger Junior Member
since 2006-01-15
Posts 25Kentucky, USA |
You definately got your emotions through. but there is one thing i would change in the line "Could hope be alive if i had taken cocaine" i would change taken to done because cocaine is not generally "taken" like you would a pill. But this is a very emotional peice, and very good. |
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Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I have to agree if you remove the line with reference to cocaine, (as it is the odd man out) the poem works way better and packs a stronger punch without it. Nicely done. |
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elpoeta Junior Member
since 2006-01-17
Posts 15Puerto Rico |
Thank you very much for your comments. They are welcome and greatly appreciated. This was tough putting onto paper as I had to explore what was truly going on inside of me... and thus I came up with the fact that "Depression Hurts"! I went to the woods because I wanted to live life deliberately... |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
elpoetra "Depression hurts." Yes, it does!!  and welcome to Passions! |
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