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Critical Analysis #2
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sean_krazy
Junior Member
since 2002-09-14
Posts 33


0 posted 2004-04-17 09:47 AM


3 Men Hangin...

I’m one,
Please let me down…
I will rise up and apologize
I will let her stand up and slap up
Where is my disguise?
Those little eyes,
Eyes are, eyes are…let me cherish ‘em
Let me escape…
And I will cherish them again…

Keep, keep breathing
Sin won’t show sorrow to you.
You, cherish little?
Cherish little, eyes? haha
Paine I’m in two.
Let me go will you?
I won’t go with him
Yesterday I woke up from your dreams,
Pack,
Pack and get dressed
And I will go…
Come back without you,
And put everything in its right place…

Oh god, there are,
Two colors,
Colors in his head…
Why have you lived for?
I’m very blue…
I want to rise up,
Eyes are nice but dreams are portable.
To be born to a virgin,
I,
I am proud…

Hi guys...im not sure if you will realize whats going on in this poem...3 men are on the midst of gettin hung for each crime each as committed...the first...seduced little kids...the 2nd...loved a certain woman...but couldn't tolerate her and hence killed her...the last one....was born to a virgin...witchcraft perhaps?  or did his mother commit adultry?  the passion of the Christ still lingers in my heart...
hope u enjoyed this poem

© Copyright 2004 sean_krazy - All Rights Reserved
forne_marin
Member
since 2004-04-13
Posts 140
Spartanburg, South Carolina
1 posted 2004-04-17 12:08 PM


I'm participate in a fiction-writers weekly, and the leader of the group has a catchphrase, "show don't tell". One you explained what was going on at the bottom, the poem made worlds more sense, but first time through it totally lost me. I didn't know what was going on. My recommendation is to start out the blocks with an i., ii., and iii. I think it would make it much easier to make sense of.

Aside from that, I liked it--once I figured it out.

rainydaymusic
Junior Member
since 2004-01-14
Posts 26

2 posted 2004-04-22 08:24 PM


I liked it while I was reading the first stanza, and the second.. but then I dropped off because I didn't understand.  Then you explain at the bottom and I re-read, and then I thought, alright.  

It's abstract.. The most concrete thing is the title.  I dig the style though.

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