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freckles
Member
since 2000-02-12
Posts 160
Virginia USA

0 posted 2000-03-06 11:07 PM



Safely hidden inside myself
My heart neatly put upon a shelf

I've built a wall all around you see
To keep others from getting too close to me

There used to be a door to get through
Opened for just a very select few

I've boarded it up and locked it tight
And turned my sunshine into night

There is no key to open the door
For I won't be as foolish as I was before

I've built a wall to protect my heart
To keep it from being torn apart

You say, "I'll climb the wall; it doesn't matter"
But the wall is twenty feet high, and yours is a ten foot ladder


[This message has been edited by freckles (edited 03-07-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 freckles - All Rights Reserved
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

1 posted 2000-03-06 11:17 PM


A great poem about a very sad subject.   Don't keep the door barricaded too long.

Denise

freckles
Member
since 2000-02-12
Posts 160
Virginia USA
2 posted 2000-03-06 11:24 PM


Thank you for the kind words Denise......I'll have to wait and see about the other; don't know if I can afford to go there again.
Little_Spyro
Senior Member
since 2000-01-09
Posts 659
San Diego, CA, USA
3 posted 2000-03-07 12:46 PM


Sad, yeah...but you know, there are ladders that telescope far beyond their looks! You'll find someone with a ladder like that, I guarantee it!  

Little Spyro T. Dragon

danni
Senior Member
since 1999-11-20
Posts 688
wisconsin
4 posted 2000-03-07 01:23 AM


i had locked my heart away for about three years. and now i that i have been wanting to open it back up a little, it is so very difficult. and that is not a good thing. while it is good to keep yourself protected, do it by holding tight to the lessons learned. anyway- listen to me talk like i'm a know-it-all!   forgive me. anyway- this was nice poem. as you can see it got my mind going.  
Jon Mewett
Senior Member
since 2000-03-04
Posts 1304

5 posted 2000-03-07 03:19 AM


Somewhere over that wall there's a light.
Any day now,any day now!!
If you want it?

I like your poem a lot

Jon M.

twinsgd
Member
since 2000-02-13
Posts 416
Ontario,Canada
6 posted 2000-03-07 06:23 AM


I've walked and I've walked all around your wall
and you are right, it is very tall
so I slipped a note beneath your door
If you wish to escape then please please call

childomine
Senior Member
since 2000-01-25
Posts 818
st. petersburg, FL
7 posted 2000-03-07 06:36 AM


Boy can I relate to this Freckles.  Yes a wall will keep you from getting hurt but it will also keep you from finding happiness.  Don't let the wall stay so long that the door rusts and the heart too.

      

freckles
Member
since 2000-02-12
Posts 160
Virginia USA
8 posted 2000-03-07 06:56 AM


Thank you to everyone for reading and responding.

Little Spyro T. Dragon----hhhhhhhhmmmmmmm I guess I'll have to take those telescoping ladders into consideration.  

danni----I'm trying to learn from the lessons, but it is hard.  Thanks for the kind words.

Jon----Thank you too for the kind words...I'm not sure whether I'll see that light or not.

twinsgd----I lit a candle and looked around, but your note was not found upon the ground.

childomine----Thanks for the encouragement; I'll try not to let either rust (the tears  could make that happen, let alone time).  


[This message has been edited by freckles (edited 03-07-2000).]

JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA
9 posted 2000-03-07 10:46 AM


I liked your ending best, but the whole poem had something about it I really liked.  The idea of a wall that nobody can get to really apealed to me!

Joy

busylisa_ca
Junior Member
since 2000-03-01
Posts 39

10 posted 2000-03-07 11:36 AM


Nice poem, very touching.  That wall will break down soon, you can only "hide out" for so long.  SMILE!

busylisa

Gene
Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935
Colorado, USA
11 posted 2000-03-07 01:18 PM


Wonderful poem. I liked this very much.

quote:
You say, "I'll climb the wall; it doesn't matter"
But the wall is twenty feet high, and yours is a ten foot ladder

My zen master would say, "then get a taller ladder."  

~Gene


freckles
Member
since 2000-02-12
Posts 160
Virginia USA
12 posted 2000-03-07 10:52 PM


Again, thank you to everybody for reading and for responding with such kindness.

Joy---thank you for the kind words.  Now, if I could just find out how to make the pain go away while I'm locked in my safe little world.

busylisa---I can't hide forever??  Why not?  It hurts in here, but it hurts more out there.  Thanks for reading and for the encouragement.

gene---Thank you too.  I'm glad you liked the poem.  My zen master would say, "Build a higher wall."    




[This message has been edited by freckles (edited 03-07-2000).]

Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
13 posted 2000-03-08 01:56 PM




Freckles, I can't begin to describe the effect that your poem has had on me.  It is so very well written and is such a bitter piece to read.  It's like you wrote this poem about me.  This is the first poem that I have read by you, and I am very impressed. I look forward to more poetry by you.

Take care,
Melissa Honeybee  

Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
14 posted 2000-03-08 02:16 PM



Freckles, after posting my first reply to you, I re-read your poem two more times, and I had to reply again.  Like I said before, this poem hit very hard to home.  You and I you could say are in the same boat, although each experience is it's own hell, different from the next.  I cannot understand what you are going through nor can you understand why this poem has had a great effect on me. But, at least understand that you can talk to me anytime, my email is missy1angel@hotmail.com.
Please listen to all the good advice that everyone has written for you in their replies, they are your friends and care about you.  Believe me, I know all too well about the walls.  I, myself have erected electric fences with guard dogs and with extra walls in front of me because I am afraid of being hurt.  I won't go into details, but, I had a bad childhood and as a result it has affected me in a profound way.  My thinking is that if my father couldn't love me, no man can, so now I protect my heart with walls.  I am sure that both of us want to be free of these walls, but tearing them down is a scary thing.  And even though the others have given you great advice, even they cannot understand that it is easier said than done.  But, please remember that with these walls erected around you, you are your own worst hangman.
Believe me, I know all too well.  Omigod, I have the gift for gab, us women talk too much huh? LOL    But, I just had to reply to you again.

Take care,
Melissa Honeybee

freckles
Member
since 2000-02-12
Posts 160
Virginia USA
15 posted 2000-03-09 05:01 AM


Melissa---Thank you so much for reading and responding.  I am glad that my poem touched you in such an intense way.  Writing is therapy for my soul; the fact that someone else might enjoy and/or relate to it is an added bonus.  If you don't hear from me right away, don't think it's because I don't wish to talk to you; I'm involved in a play right now and rehearsals keep me running several nights a week.  Thanks again.
Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
16 posted 2000-03-09 09:06 AM


Freckles:

    I just wanted to let you know that my new email address is canadahoneybee@hotmail.com

Take care,
Melissa Honeybee  

StarrGazer
Senior Member
since 2000-03-05
Posts 679
Texas
17 posted 2000-03-09 11:27 AM


Just dont build the wall of brick
or make the barricade too thick
Someone worthy will come along
Dont hold against them anothers wrong
Perhaps you could add a door
And when feeling a little unsure
you could always go inside
and there your insecuritys hide?

sorry bad attempt lol
but yours was great done that myself a couple of times and speaking from experience don't shut those who truly love you out !!!


 ~*Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear*~


passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
18 posted 2004-12-25 09:26 AM


good one here! I can so relate!
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