some choices do haunt us, eh?

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bleeding
New Member

since 2000-01-06

Posts 1

0 posted 2001-02-04 12:26 PM

Choices

Sitting alone at table for two
his memories filling his awareness
little appreciation for surroundings.
Not tasting gourmet food, nor wine
his thoughts lost in yesterday
overcome with crowded loneliness.

The busy happiness of life
surrounding him, swirling with purpose
the players stepping to the dance.
His mind turns to irony
as he remembers once upon a time
he was exactly as they, fooled.

The family in the middle
with upscale, bright children
not a clue what life has in store.
Laughter and sudden excitement
as servers bring out candled cake
singing to the young princess.

Young, fresh lovers in corner
sharing a touch, stolen kiss
entwined arms sharing promise.
For the moment, captured
photographed with memory
a time to cherish, perhaps to haunt.

The laughter comes unbidden
like a painful exclamation
he sees her, sitting same as he.
His memories unfold wistfully
eyes meeting as they once did
before they decided to be alone.

"Tis ink coming
from his arm,
Captain!"

the artist once
bleeding...
now just

kcsgrandma
Senior Member

since 2000-09-24

Posts 1522
Presque Isle, ME

1 posted 2001-02-04 01:26 PM

                                                    His mind turns to irony
                                            as he remembers once upon a time
                                              he was exactly as they, fooled.

Daniel, the bitterness in these lines sort of hit me in the middle and knocked the wind out today. Most of us who are alone are so as the result of somebody's choices, though not necessarily our own.  These lines remind me of those who say God is an illusion because He does not reveal Himself in the ways they choose. Who is fooled here, and who is not?  Interesting reading.

To love another person is to see the face of God.
- Les Miserables

Marilyn

PhaerieChild
Senior Member

since 1999-08-30

Posts 1787
Aloha, Oregon

2 posted 2001-02-04 01:31 PM

Dan, This is so very sad. The last 2 lines really got to me. Love ya....Sis

How can you save me?
When the dark comes right in and takes me,
from my front walk and into bed,
where it kisses my face and eats my head. Shivaree

pegasus111
Member Elite

since 2000-07-27

Posts 2219
ocala, fl, usa

3 posted 2001-02-04 07:42 PM

isn't it ironic that happy people are oblivious to the mood of others outside their circle of contentment? and conversely,
unhappy people are most aware of the joy outside their own pain. man is indeed a strange and complex animal.

the woods are lovely, dark, and deep, but I have promises to keep, and many miles to go before I sleep...Frost

laryalee
Member

since 2000-06-19

Posts 352
Alberta, Canada

4 posted 2001-02-04 08:55 PM

Sad yet meaningful - he is so bitter. Fortunately, most people have hope, though sometimes faded. It's a well-drawn picture, and nicely done!
Lary

Denise

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-08-22

Posts 22648

5 posted 2001-02-04 09:18 PM

Daniel, this is excellently written. Wonderfully done. I see that you are using your old user name. Check out Ron's announcement in Announcements....he will get to all the problems as soon as possible. He is not ignoring any of them. He is swamped at the moment and going down the list. Soon all will be well! Again, great poem!!

Tramp Poet
Senior Member

since 2000-01-06

Posts 754
Could Be Anywhere...

6 posted 2001-02-05 11:32 AM

hey all!  thanks for the imput and comments...puzzled as to how the
bitterness was perceived.  Thought that was
an obscure underlaying theme...fascinating
how others view the work...thank you
the intent of this piece was to be 10
haiku's arranged comfortably to illustrate
the choices one (or two) makes and how
some of those choices do indeed haunt one.
The prinicple charachter is bitter and
obviously not at peace with a choice he feels was thurst upon him.  didn't imagine  that aspect would come through with
the strength y'all have seen. I rather
supposed the women who is shown to be
the same creature of habit and lonliness
to be the center of others comments...
go figger.

the artist foremeerly known as bleeding

Gene
Senior Member

since 2000-01-23

Posts 935
Colorado, USA

7 posted 2001-02-05 01:04 PM

I know the feeling. The world isn't rigged for a table for one. --Gene

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