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A Haiku You Don't Want to Read( read at your own risk)
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A Haiku You Don't Want to Read( read at your own risk) |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore 
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Vibrant rose withered~ Your poems are worth nothing~ Both long past their prime |
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| © Copyright 2000 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Little_Spyro Senior Member
since 2000-01-09
Posts 659San Diego, CA, USA |
lol, well, I came, I saw, I...well, no, I didn't conquer, but I still thought this was a good one!  Little Spyro T. Dragon |
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Songbird Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184Missouri |
Nothing? senimental rose...poppori fragrance.. pleasant memory.. or one you wish you could forget? Cute poem LOL |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
thanx for reading it anyway,Little_Spyro and Septsong LOL  bringing this up again with: A Haiku You Don't Want To Read Out mist-coated pane~ Parched leaf at mercy of gale~ A loved one shuts eyes pls tell me which of the two u prefer |
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Ted Reynolds Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 331 |
Both so sad. |
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kelieth Member
since 2000-06-12
Posts 314Normal IL - USA |
I thought this was good and sad as well. Kevin "Anything is possible with patience, time is the tool use it to reach your goals." |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
OUCH! I hope that is not directed at me. The title is quiet poignant for whoever the haiku is aimed at. really enjoyed it. I think I prefer the 2nd one, the first one has a sense of anger where the second one is more sad and the images are beautiful, "Parched leaf at mercy of gale~" love that line. "monuments put from pen to paper turns me into a gutless wonder" Manic street preachers |
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Jeremiah Johnson Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223Brooksville, Fl, U.S |
well its me again i love both of them and is see it as sad but at the same time as helping to the person whos poems are bad to tell them write better. well there wonderful as always. I'm a dying romantic and when i can no longer write i can no longer live -Jeremiah Johnson- |
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childomine Senior Member
since 2000-01-25
Posts 818st. petersburg, FL |
Both are very good. So few words that leave a lasting impression. ...Give me the strength to walk the soft earth, a relative to all that is.... Black Eagle Oglala Sioux holy man |
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Mon Cherie
since 2001-10-31
Posts 922Land of Never-ending Summers |
Both are so real, it really hurts to read. I am not just saying it coz I really felt the pain when I saw "a loved one shuts eyes" I guess as compared to someone dying, I'd prefer a withering rose and my poem having no readers...  though the latter is more of disappointment and hurt than real sadness._,,,^.^,,,_ |
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Yu Lan Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462New Zealand |
The second one is definitely my preference Kaile. I don't like the first one nearly as much as some of your others, I'm not sure I understand the point to it. BUT your second one is beautifully sad.. and you're right, one I don't want to read in real life.. |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
I enjoyed both of them, as they are fragments, reflections of the diversity of your mind, part of your unique POV, your self-portrait. |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
sigh |
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