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Gay Klutz(Lost dreamer's challenge)
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Gay Klutz(Lost dreamer's challenge) |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore 
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Forlorn me stands alone in an obscure dark corner, like a cripped pup who whines resigned as it witnesses its siblings going to new homes with smiling masters Loud blaring music plays Sea of heads bobs up and down rhythmically Their eyes closed, Their bodies dancing in tune I nearly choked on my drink Why, some of them looked so stiff! They seemed like puppets being controlled by a higher Being who manipulated their every movement I stood back, content to stay in the background For what could a mere fat school girl do? Then my heart skipped a beat as I saw you walking over "Will you like to dance?" Your eyes twinkling bright, Your strong hand stretched out, You grinned at me Those were simple words to you perhaps But they felt like pelts of sweet raindrops much-awaited after a prolonged drought "But I can't dance" I protested, my face glowing red in embarrassment "I am the greatest uncoordinated klutz in this world" But you smiled in return, your hand still stretched out "Shouldn't we try?" You said simply Bowed to the ground,my lips wavered Dancing was something Greek to me But I couldn't pluck up courage to say no Taking your hand, Walking hand in hand to the dance floor like the King and Queen sauntering to their throne, I felt like i was in heaven Every fat girl has her day |
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| © Copyright 2000 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved | |||
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childomine Senior Member
since 2000-01-25
Posts 818st. petersburg, FL |
Kaile - I absolutely love this. An awesome piece of work!!! ...Give me the strength to walk the soft earth, a relative to all that is.... Black Eagle Oglala Sioux holy man |
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Songbird Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184Missouri |
Hey, you just had another great day, the day you wrote this poem, this was really good, I enjoyed it very much. You have a great heart for poetry, keep it up! I liked your ending line but I do hope you'll have many more great days. |
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Lost Dreamer Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464Somewhere near the Rainbow |
This is fabulous, I love how you led up to the dance and then the final feelings. Maybe you feel your a klutz on the dance floor, but your poetry danced beautiful. Thank you for taking the challenge to a wonderful level, I really love this poem.  |
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Yu Lan Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462New Zealand |
Wow, this is amazing, yeah it sure did dance, agree with L.D there! ^_^ what a great poem!! Lynne |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
good one! i'm way behind on reading, so i'm not up on this "challenge" thing....?? but i thought this was a great feeling poem..i love that the "wall flower" gets her turn!!  "A Poet's life is on written page; a scenario to take the stage--watch..." dgvarner |
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Brenda Hall Member
since 2000-05-30
Posts 88Texas,USA |
Good Poem kaile,keep up the good work! You struck a nerve with me,and I imagine many people! |
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Jana Tovey Member
since 2000-05-30
Posts 257USA |
And so she should! I loved the build up...great anticipation, and what an ending! |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Everyone who feels less than perfect can relate to this poem. You did a great job!!  |
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Mon Cherie
since 2001-10-31
Posts 922Land of Never-ending Summers |
Oh!!!!! I simply love this one... Feels like you were referring to me when you said "mere fat school girl". Yet sadly, til now, none has asked me for a dance...  _,,,^.^,,,_ |
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