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Open Poetry #4
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Magic Potion?
| Open Poetry #4 |
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Magic Potion? |
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RSEvans Senior Member
since 1999-10-23
Posts 1147Tulsa, OK, USA 
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My attempt to join Bal's shadow.... "Hi y'all", he said with a southern drawl As he took the stand in cape and shawl "I'm sorry to have kept ya waitin so long," His voice was old but yet sing-song. "I'm now around 80...", he said with a grin His boyish charm flashing from deep within "but I feel much younger and you can too. This tonic I sell can do it for you." "It's no ordinary tonic", he went on to say, "It's no accident that I'm here today. This tonic's a wonder, no doubt about it You'll wonder how you ever lived without it." He opened a vial and wafted the scent Then down towards an old woman he bent. "Smell that?", he said, asking curiously. "Smells like everlasting life to me." The old woman bent inclining her head She tried hard to smell it, then simply said "I don't smell a thing, not a thing at all. "Exactly!", he yelled as he stood again tall. "You want what I have its abundantly clear, A cure for your hopes and loves and fear It's easy to gain, won't cost you a toll Just your faith your trust and your soul." "You see this tonic I have in this vial," He alluded again and said with a smile, "Is more than a liquid gleaned from man It will cure all your ills as only it can." "It's God's own love, which is freely given, Given to those who will only accept him. I wish you could feel as I do right now And listen closely and I'll tell you how." "Don't place your faith in immortal potion Or curses or hexes or things of that notion, Just simply believe that He gave his Son To die on the cross for everyone." I smiled with a tear at his simple solution That we had been led to believe was a potion. I knelt there that day, near the old man And gave all to God, now I understand. ------------------ Once I was brilliant, now I no longer shine, but the twinkle in my eye speaks of another time. [This message has been edited by RSEvans (edited 11-17-1999).] |
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| © Copyright 1999 Rob Evans - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Wow, You have outdone yourself, Robert. This one was great and what a message to convey. No potion, indeed... michael |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
It's fantastic, yep - that's the right word. |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Wonderfully written RSE.......take your bow  ------------------ Alis volat propriis (She flies with her own wings) |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Great poem, great message! ------------------ Denise |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
Wonderful poem! I loved it! Did you know we have a Spiritual Forum too? If you have anymore like this I would love to have you post them in Spiritual. I'm sure others would enjoy to read them too! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Good work, Robert. Ain't storytelling fun?! |
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poetFemmeFatale Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646Arkansas |
Ah indeed, I do love storytelling poetically!! Sigh* one of the ONLY reasons I tolerate 'ol Balladeer! I just LOVE to read his ditties, cause you never know what you're standing in - - LOL  to Balladeer....My dear brother, on a more serious note, this is superbly and splendidly done!! Not at all what I was expecting, and you're right....it's not magic - just love...but then, at times, aren't they the same? They sure feel the same to me! Very nice story!------------------ ~~ Lift your head high - spread your "words" and fly - - poetFemmeFatale |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
RSEvans, I can't add much more to the above,except Congradulations on a wonderful poem. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Well done! I don't think you're standing in anyone's shadow. *S* |
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RSEvans Senior Member
since 1999-10-23
Posts 1147Tulsa, OK, USA |
Thank you all...and welcome back Femme..we missed you. This is the only way I pay homage to the ones I appreciate the most. Bal is indeed a master storyteller... ------------------ Once I was brilliant, now I no longer shine, but the twinkle in my eye speaks of another time. |
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Iloveit Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 1121NM |
RS this is beautiful and really well done, yep you join the ranks of the story tellers |
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Deb Lynne Member
since 1999-08-19
Posts 180Where blue skies meet blue ocean |
RS...you shall be including among the master storytellers! You guys make me want to strive that much harder!!! Loved this one!! |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Very good story in rhyme! I liked this....(Don't that Balladeer just make ya sick sometimes?)......But he does influence and motivate such great works as this doesn't he?..... |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
I echo what's already been said, great story and message here RS. |
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Ohme Senior Member
since 1999-07-17
Posts 816Texas |
RS, can only say Amen ! ------------------ Yesterday is history, tomorrow just a mystery. And if today is good to me how could I ask for more? |
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RSEvans Senior Member
since 1999-10-23
Posts 1147Tulsa, OK, USA |
**wiping a tear away**They like me...they really, really like me... Thanks everyone for making a poor hillbilly feel at home. ------------------ Once I was brilliant, now I no longer shine, but the twinkle in my eye speaks of another time. |
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Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
I echo all above RS.....Great story! ------------------ A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extraordinaire! |
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