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Open Poetry #4
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Ayla
Member
since 1999-08-31
Posts 50


0 posted 1999-12-14 12:21 PM


He held out a hand to her as the
soft melody of a love ballad fills the air.
Holding her gently in his embrace,
He looked into her pale,beautiful face.
Her eyes were closed,
As if savouring the magical moment.
They moved along to their music of love,
while the stars and moon shone brightly above.
The love of two is stronger than ever.
But their parting is inevitable.
He felt a lump in his throat as tears threaten to fall.
This woman that he loves dearly,
would leave him any minute.

She leaned her head against his chest
and heaved a sigh of contentment.
Her voice,soft as whisper,almost inaudible.
"I love you Greg.For all that you've done.
Granting my wish,and most importantly,
Thank you for loving me."
Hearing her heartfelt words was the last straw.
Through his falling tears,
He told her that he loves her too.

They danced and danced and danced.
Till she could dance no more.
He felt her body go limp in his arms.
She was gone...
Laying her on the soft warm sand,
He kissed her gently on the lips.
And wiped off a tear slipping from her eyes.
The love of his life would forever sleep.
But in his heart,she is still alive.




 Yesterday is history.Tomorrow is a mystery.Today is a Gift.That's why we call it The Present. - The Millennium Bug


© Copyright 1999 Ayla - All Rights Reserved
blewaway5
Junior Member
since 1999-12-09
Posts 10

1 posted 1999-12-14 04:09 PM


   This is a very pretty poem, and I liked it a lot.  The only thing I could tell you is maybe think about keeping it all in one tense.  That's a minor little thing though.  A very beautiful poem.
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

2 posted 1999-12-15 12:31 PM


Ayla, this is absolutely beautiful and wonderful and sad! I enjoyed this one very much!         

 Denise



UNLOVED-1
Junior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 16
dominican republic
3 posted 1999-12-15 10:33 AM


I think it is a very beautiful poem with a lot of feelings put in to it. I personally loved it.

 otis omar

Ayla
Member
since 1999-08-31
Posts 50

4 posted 1999-12-15 10:42 AM


Thank you all.I was wondering whether I should change the last line..

 Yesterday is history.Tomorrow is a mystery.Today is a Gift.That's why we call it The Present. - The Millennium Bug


Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
5 posted 1999-12-15 10:55 AM


Ayla,
Enjoyed the read.

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